have decided

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
have decided
14
Fri, 09-24-2004 - 12:24pm
update on me...

I've decided to pull back from the trav thing. He's not here and I don't see that changing any time soon. It's hard because he doesn't even read his email very often, but I sent him a message telling him that I'm backing off and that I feel he really doesn't have time for a relationship right now. If he really wanted to, he could talk me into reconsidering...I don't see that happening either. We're just not close enough to anything like commitment.

So many things in my life are changing. My ex is moving to ND, and my youngest (who has despised him the most) has pretty much decided to move there too. She says she wants to live somewhere new and try that challenge...if that happens it will mean a big change for all of us. And I'll be without kids sooner. I'm not sure how to handle that, but I guess one day at a time is good. I am happier with company than without, so the prospect of them all being gone sooner would change my perspective on dating. I'll be more looking for someone permanent if this all comes to pass. Someone here and permanent.

I had a flirtation with someone here, but it hasn't gone anywhere. I don't think I'll do the internet thing again. With grad classes and such I'm meeting plenty of people in real life, with common interests. If I don't run onto someone that way, perhaps it's not meant to be. I have things to do and need to just get on with them, get my degree, get into some satisfying work.

I've been exercising on my own and I think I'm going to start karate this week or next.

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Avatar for cl_beckty
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: revenoc
Mon, 09-27-2004 - 10:59am
You can't imagine how powerful it feels to be getting back in shape.... I was doing VERY well working out several times a week for nearly two months. Longest most consistent time I've ever done that in my life. But I got away from it for a couple of months and I just feel like crap. And you're right. It IS empowering. So much so that I must start back at it this week. I've been fighting depression big time and I know that will help. Taking charge and ruling my body instead of letting it rule me sounds very appealing again.
Becky

Becky

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: revenoc
Mon, 09-27-2004 - 11:02am
go beck! YOu can do it...

What's your plan? What kind of workout do you do?

Avatar for cl_beckty
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: revenoc
Mon, 09-27-2004 - 11:28am

I enjoy (using the term loosely here. LOL) getting on the Eliptical trainer for about 30 minutes. I probably won't hit it for 30 minutes yet, becuase I haven't been down there, but I'll work back up to it.


Then I use the weight training machines for a while. Don't lift major amounts of of weight. Just smaller with a lot of rep's. I like those better than free weights for the time being. Then I do some crunches, because the ab machine never feels like it's as effective. When I was doing this before, I felt GREAT about myself, but never lost an inch OR a pound. And that is my goal. And I love food TOO much to limit myself to any diet regime. I can be healthier and make wise decisions. But I don't do well when I have to stick to rules. I did South Beach for about 2 months, and I did lose 12 lbs and was ecstatic, but it wasn't a lifestyle I could personally live with. We'll see how it goes. Keep me posted on yours!

Becky

Becky

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
In reply to: revenoc
Tue, 09-28-2004 - 9:57am
Candi, I'm sorry that things with Trav didn't work like you had hoped, but I think you made a very good decision. You have to think of yourself and if he's not there, you are inno better situation than being totally single. I know you both care for each other and maybe one day it will happen for you, but if not, you have a great attitude about looking right where you are and taking the chance to run into a nice guy that will fulfill what you need right now.

As for your youngest moving...I'm really shocked. But I know you feel you have to support your kids to do what they feel is best. It's hard. Dylan can make that decision when he's eleven (well according to Scott, he can) and if he decided to move, I'd be devastated. But I'd have to allow it. But the chance remains that you will get your DD back home earlier than you expected. Sometimes, it seems so cool to go elsewhere and then it's not all it's cracked up to be.

I hope everything works out and will be thinking of ya!

Mel

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