Heartbreaking comment from dd tonite ...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Heartbreaking comment from dd tonite ...
45
Sat, 01-19-2008 - 6:24pm

& i was stunned.


She fell off the playground equip today & really got hurt. She's ok now, but as most little girls will do, she cried for her daddy, after i comforted her. I let her call him & she called him crying. He seemed to be able to calm her down a bit. BUT ... then he asked to speak with me - i refused.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2003
Sat, 01-26-2008 - 10:08am

I think this is one of those situations where "you had to be there" to really see the whole picture.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
Sat, 01-26-2008 - 10:17am
I'm not "asking her to do" anything; it's her life and her decision.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Sat, 01-26-2008 - 11:31am
I agree with Soonee and citylife. I encourage rlch to keep posting as much as she wants because she has come a long way with this situation that is so difficult for anyone to go through, never mind with a crazy exh and wanting the best for a kid. That is what we are here for. :-) It is a long saga and not done by any means.
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
Sat, 01-26-2008 - 1:58pm
Thank you very much for the warm
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
Sat, 01-26-2008 - 4:23pm
How invested she is or has to be is a direct result of her disturbed ex. You are entitled to your opinion as well as free to point out anything you think may be helpful. The paragraph I reprinted is what disturbed me but it was more to have you take another look at it than to tell you you arent welcome. Upfront is a great style to have and I appreciate it just as soonee does but I would hate to see rlch discouraged from posting when she needs to, as much as she needs to without people thinking she thrives on the drama. It is IMHO offensive to imply that she thrives on any part of this.
Lilypie - Personal picture
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2007
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 2:13am

OK, I didn't read any of the responses to this so if they already said it, I apologize.


Reading what you've said, they see their father as a source of commiserating

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2004
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 8:33am
Well, I agree that she can post as often as she wants, with as much detail and emotion as she likes, but others are also entitled to draw whatever conclusions seem apparent from those posts.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 9:03am
I dont think her DD is in the next room to face her as soon as she finishes venting on here. I think rlch is smarter than that about how she times letting her feelings out.
We clearly disagree on this one.
Lilypie - Personal picture
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 11:40pm

Thank you girls for your support. Just returned from a great family weekend away (threw my brother a 20 person surpise party at this great, fun Mexican restaraunt with a strolling Mariache (sp??) band. It was a blast!


Anyway, just back to the board & saw the recent posts. I will briefly (which i know, is rare for me! lol) say that I wholeheartedly appreciate the support from my friends here. Yes, many of you know the entire story & I come here for advice from

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sun, 01-27-2008 - 11:57pm

Hi Silver Lining - You are right in the fact that the worst time FOR her to call him is at a time like that. Sometimes though, we make mistakes as parents. I know you dont "know" the history, as you said, but she was very VERY close to her Dad. He is a changed person than he was - than the father she knew - in the past 3 years. Its VERY had for her to accept that & understand that. Therefore, its really hard for HER to not have him at her "diposal" as Daddy. I rarely even NEED to intervene when she wants to call him b/c either she is calling him appropriately, OR, more often, she's not calling him at all.


Its not a pattern at all. I wouldnt let it be. I know he is overly emotional, innapropriate AND will use anything she is upset about to HIS advantage, if he can. Eg: "If daddy was there, I would help you".

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