He's Afraid to Meet my Kids
Find a Conversation
He's Afraid to Meet my Kids
| Thu, 08-28-2008 - 8:39am |
At least I think he is. And my kids arent particularly scary either. RG wont do anything with me that involves my kids. He hasnt said he wont but he avoids it. I have asked hundreds of times and he says he will but when the time comes he always has an excuse or cant be contacted. He's good at avoidance.
So I wonder, why doesnt common sense get the better of me? Why is it I keep hanging on to him and hoping something will come of it?
Laurie

Pages
I have a millionair Australian man from Sydney that flies to the states on business 3-4 times a year and is no where near me, but he just flies to good ole N.C. to wine, dine and crazy spoil me for two days before he leaves for Australia again (yes, I know, I still have my secrets). He's coming again in the next two weeks when he can pinpoint his travel dates. We have the BEST sex. I've known this man 13 years where we met and worked together in Europe and we have always just had this sexual chemistry, but never did anything about it, until this year. Sooo as far as getting your boots blown off for good sex, distance is only relevant. You deserve it woman! You've lived a nuns life WAY to long!
The only problem with my perscription on getting sex, is regretting that you waited that long to get it again.
Dr. Cat
There are a lot of things about RG that dont add up. I have been patiently trying to understand them for a long time. He is guarded and doesnt comunicate well about deep issues. But I am getting frustrated. He senses me pulling back and has asked me to do things more often and do things he usually refused to do (kayaking). But I refused to see him tonight opting to take the kids school shopping instead.
Laurie
I have learned with people that it is better to deal with the behavior they are showing me rather than to understand them. Their behavior is their "truth" and regardless if I understand what they are doing or not, if it does not work for me then it does not matter how much I understand them to make a good relationship. This only works if I'm stuck with them, i.e. family members otherwise it's a waste of my time and energy to understand people if their behavior is not in alignment with my values and what I want.
As with you, sometimes I am willing to tolerate behavior that does not work for me because of other things, e.g. the attractiveness of the other person, good sex (or the promise of it), or the hope that the behavior will change once they trust more.
BTW that is what I don't like about people saying about "going slow" or needing trust the other person before they reveal themselves fully. I don't want to invest months of my life with someone to figure out who they really are and then find out they are not a match. This holding back stuff drives me nuts and I find that I don't have the patience for it. I am fortunate to have met Cute Widow for she does not do that for she has learned from the sudden death of her husband that life is indeed too short to do such things.
Mark
We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese Proverb
Thanks Mark. You really are blessed with an interesting and unique girlfriend. I am glad things are working out for you. I appreciate your presence on the boards. Its good to hear from the 'otherside' too.
Laurie
<>
Precisely Mark!
Living in Adelaide, South Australia
CL of
~ Aussie & Kiwi Mums ~
Email me!
Tracy
Hi Laurie! I just kinda wanted to give my 2 cents even though you have gotten great advice from everyone so far! It is a HUGE HUGE red flag that after all this time he does not want to meet your kids! And you keep saying stuff about how handsome he is...maybe you need to evaluate why this seems to be particularly important to you. ( I do not want to offend you by any means but it might be a self esteem issue on your part to need to hold on to a man that is not worthy of you based on HIS looks?) I know I would rather be with someone less attractive that gave me all I deserve than someone handsome that held back and avoided my children like they had cooties! Sorry if I offended you...just my 2 cents!
Telissa
Pages