hes broke

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-05-2003
hes broke
8
Tue, 08-24-2004 - 9:33am
i am not at all into being w people for money or anything like that but this guy i have been with gives 1/2 of what he makes in child support and leaves him w nothing. he used his last $3 for the week for gas yesterday. i am very very independant own my own house, car everything, am a single mom, and i would just like you no dinner, flowers, little things sometimes, but he stays broke, is this mean of me 2 feel liek this. what would u guys do
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
In reply to: honeyap
Tue, 08-24-2004 - 9:49am
I would throw him into the pond and seek someone who has his life sorted out and is ready for you and deserving of you. No hesitation.

You are better off alone than with Mr. Wrong. Besides, Mr. Wrong is taking up valuable real estate and prevents you from meeting Mr. Right.

Good luck. Dating is never easy - but you have to be true to yourself first.

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
In reply to: honeyap
Tue, 08-24-2004 - 10:42am
While I commend him for paying child support as a responsible father, I do ask you to be careful that he doesn't sap off of you. Having said that, try and think, does he do stuff even little stuff that's nice? Why did you stay with him so long? Or do you feel like a booty call? It depends if this guy can really do it and doesn't want too, or just can't because he doesn't have that sort of income. It's not just the flowers and dinner, THOUGH I am a sucker for it just the same, BUT I do make sure that I meet a man AT ALL TIMES, that can always afford it, children or no children, but sometimes, love hits a different way for other people and some people can deal withhout all the frills. I need a little frill; but this is europe, so anything that is paid for, including a cup of coffee, is considered frills for me. LOL
Avatar for cl_tcranky1
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
In reply to: honeyap
Tue, 08-24-2004 - 11:52am

Hi


I also think he's at least responsible enough to pay child support.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-21-2004
In reply to: honeyap
Tue, 08-24-2004 - 3:31pm
I don't know. Sometimes, I think some guys will just say all their money goes somewhere, when it really doesn't. Perhaps he isn't managing his money very well. My best friend dates a guy who tells her 75% of his incomes goes for CP. Somehow, I question this. I don't see how a judge would order someone to pay 75% of their income for CP.
Avatar for cl_beckty
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: honeyap
Tue, 08-24-2004 - 3:55pm

I don't think you're mean. I think you know what's important to you in a dating relationship. If you're looking for a little fun and romance (of the sort that costs a little money) from time to time, and if this guy can't provide it then look elsewhere. I am assuming this is the very beginning stages "getting to know you period" correct?


It really just depends on what is important to you.

Becky

Becky

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
In reply to: honeyap
Tue, 08-24-2004 - 4:47pm
I'm going to agree with all the posts here. It's not wrong to want to be treated to something extra once in awhile. I also wonder about his statement of child support. If he's in such a dire situation with payment, he CAN and SHOULD apply to have the support readjusted to reflect the income level he has. Encourage him to find out what the minimum/ maximum rates are for his state. I really don't see any judge ordering someone to pay out over half their income unless there's A) lots of kids in the picture or B) extreme circumstances of need, like a disabled child.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-10-2004
In reply to: honeyap
Tue, 08-24-2004 - 6:32pm
well honey not all divorces or seperations are created equal. not only is there child support but what about his alimony to. between the two she gets 1/2 of my take home pay. i also pay 1/2 medical bills for them and dental. i also had to pick up most of the credit card debt she had. i cant tell you what didnt she charge.

when you have visits i take my kids out and that is expenive. but ihave enough to go out once a week and to do little things for a friend.

any man that can show you he pays his child support on time is a responable person.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
In reply to: honeyap
Wed, 08-25-2004 - 2:42pm
my boyfriend pays half his takehome for child support and i know it really is going to child support cause i've seen his paystub. he doesn't have a lot of money but he still is able to take me out to dinner sometimes and by me flowers which is great.