Hi guys! New here
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Hi guys! New here
| Thu, 02-01-2007 - 5:19am |
Hi, i found this board and it seems great to be able to chat to others in the same position. My name is Steph, i have been single for about 6 months and have 2 kids, Damien, 6, and Akayla, 2. I actually live in Australia, but figured i would say hi anyways.
Well i get along fine with my ex, he comes and sees the kids occasionally and stays here, or i go up there and stay. And i see his Mum all the time since she lives in the same town. My problem is, how do i find the decent guys?? I live in a fairly small town of about 9000, and i swear all the good ones ran when i became single. So how do you guys do it?
Thanks anyway, and hi!
-Steph.

Hi there - and wow - we do have people from all over the world. So far, USA, Canada, Switzerland and now Australia!! (and if anyone else who is a lurker is from somewhere else you have to introduce yourself!).
Anyway, you ask the $64 million dollar question!! We all want to know where the good single guys are!!
The answer is to build from the ground up - get out and start doing as many different things as you can and keep building your social network as much as you can. The bonus side to that is that you get to have more friends so you are all bubbly and happy - which helps attract the right guy.
Church, sports, working out, social groups, volunteer work, children's activities, those are all things that come to mind.
It is a great thing that you get along with your exh!!
Hi Steph,
How to find a decent guy : don't look!
Seriously though, once you are in the right place inside yourself, the right one will come along. In the meantime, like West said, the best thing to do is get out-and-about and do things that you enjoy so that you are complete and happy in yourself. Oh! I'm not suggesting you are not already, so please don't take it the wrong way!
Are you looking to date, or for something that will lead to a long-term relationship? What are your relationship goals? Have you thought about internet dating? It definitely works for some people, and even if you don't find your life partner, you can have fun meeting guys and "practising" dating again! Plus, you get some great free dinners ;o)
I'm starving... wish I was on a dinner date right now!
Clem xx
Hello Steph,
I am new to the board also. My name is Julie. I have a Daughter Kaitlin(almost 7) and a Son Nathan(almost 2).
"i swear all the good ones ran when i became single." I have the same issue. I have also felt at times that the good ones are either married or gay. I lived in a small town as a kid and pretty much everyone new who I was my family has been around for a while. I moved for 4 years and when I came back it was like no one wanted to eventhink about dating me becuase they new me while I was in Elementary school and Jr. high and they didn't like me then. So no one wanted to talk to me little lone date me. Go figure. I started college and found new people. It also helps that I work in the Automotive industry so I am around guys all the time. (this does not mean that they are decent.)I am hoping that eventually I'll find the good one of the bunch.
I agree with what Clem said. You find a guy when you aren't looking for one.
Hi there, and welcome!
It's awesome to have an Aussie in our mix!
As far as meeting people- the town I grew up in has 600 people. There are literally more cows than humans living in that town. Yet I managed to meet people. They weren't right for me, but I did manage to meet them.
Some of us have tried online dating, with varying degrees of success. being in the right placs at the right time- with the right mindset is probably the best advice I have, and I know it doesn't help much!
Be glad those men ran when they found out you were a single mother- they weren't right for you. The guy who is won't care- and will see the innumerable benefits to dating a mom.
Also, try joining some type of club or taking up a hobby- not to meet men, but because you enjoy it. If you do meet someone there, great, but if not, you'll still have something fun to do for yourself.
Stick around, we love having new people join us!
Moody, trying out her Aussie accent
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LOL all this is so true, i am starting tafe this year (which is a college thing we have here, dont know if you guys have it) and doing a course in IT to become a certified nerd lol, or so my friends say ;) I used to go to the gym sometimes, but we only have one in town and it doesnt have a creche, so i have childcare issues... Same as i used to do karate, but they are evening classes and i have no childcare. I am thinking of trying to organise something around that tho, purely because there were some really hot guys at karate and it was great eye candy ;) hehehehe. And i want to get myself out of the house.
I have kind of looked at online dating and had a heap of responses, but most of them seem freaky or are at least twice my age. Not my thing lol.
-Steph.
I can relate to the old men. I find that they don't seem to understand younger women who are raising kids cannot just pack up and go when these geezers want them too. I think they really just are looking for some hot young thing to have sex with.
One of the problems I have is by the time I've spent the entire week working, and I come home and take care of business there, I'm exhausted and I just want to crash in front of the TV. I'm torn between wanting a relationship and not wanting to deal with anymore demands on my time. I don't know how this vicious cycle is yet going to play out.
LOL!!!! You will be shooing them away with a stick, I guarantee it!!!
Clem xx