Hit me on the head with a brick, please

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Hit me on the head with a brick, please
13
Wed, 11-12-2008 - 10:04pm

OK, so I had a date with this guy, he did all the right things, called when he said he would, made a second date, blah, blah. It's all good. He is my clone who happened to be born in another country. Same viewpoints on EVERYTHING, it's scary. Sooo easy to talk to.

So I vow I will do all the "rules", keep him at a distance, not call, yada, yada. So what do I do on the second date???? OMG, what was I thinking? I got totally caught up in the moment. I had stopped at his place so we could meet and go out, we wound up sitting, talking for a couple hours...you can figure out the rest. While I don't regret doing "it", I totally regret doing it so soon. Now I can't figure out what I want to do next. I didn't want to give the impression that I am after some casual fling, yet my actions seem to speak otherwise.

He wanted to go out and have us get something to eat afterwards, but I needed to get home to the kids. He walked me to my car and then talked about him coming up to see me, making some plans for the weekend, etc. But now I am waiting it out, trying to figure out if he was serious or just "saying the right things". I so did not want to put myself in this situation and for the life of me I can't figure out why I did it. OK I know WHY I did it, I just can't figure out why I didn't do what I promised myself. Now I feel completely poopy, not about this guy, but about ME!!!

I can't figure out why I can't do this dating thing. I think there must be something wrong with me! Some women can't keep 'em away, I can't keep 'em!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2002
Wed, 11-12-2008 - 10:21pm

no brick on the head from me... sometimes these things happen.. anyone can get caught up in the moment. So far, he is saying he wants to set up another date.... just tell him the truth that you normally don't do such things and he'll get a ego boost. then say that you aren't looking for a casual fling.


the only thing i'll give you is a "high five for getting some"...LOL... but seriously it isn't as bad as you think. don't be so hard on yourself. if he likes you, if he's into you it will all work itself out... sex on the second date or not.


i think we can't make "vows"... that we have to just let things play out the way they are meant to play out. sex or no sex, a guy who is into you will keep coming back for more... forgive yourself. today is a new day.


Hugs,


Loonybunny

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 12:42am

Bah, don't be too hard on yourself... just listen to your gut and make it better for next time: if you keep the date AWAY from the house, then there's less chance of having hormones take over LOL!

Keep things light and have some fun OUT of the house on the next date :P

Winter Alison

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 8:14am

Thanks for the support. Gee, all I was going to do was meet at the house to then go out somewhere else! I have been feeling so weird about it since I was beating myself up about my lack of willpower!

Thanks again.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 9:55am

Nah, no reason for a brick upside the head............besides it would mess up your "do" and that's just not cool ;-)

 
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 10:01am

Been there, done that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 3:24pm
Could've been worse: could've puked on the guy like Isys did :)
Winter Alison

Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 9:47pm

Wow! Now I feel a little better! All I'd had was half a glass of wine and some water!

Note to self: no margaritas early in dating cycle!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Thu, 11-13-2008 - 9:48pm

You know what? Whats done is done. & I personally doubt it will make much of a difference in the long run. If he is interested & wants to continue to see you, you'll hear from him. If not, you wont.


I know its hard & you keep guessing - it sucks!

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Fri, 11-14-2008 - 7:27am
Gee thanks guys!! LOL hahahaha!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
Fri, 11-14-2008 - 8:00am

Been there, done that. But I am living proof that it doesnt have to end there. I ended up marrying the one I slept with on the first date. These things can go either way. It doesnt necessarily mean its over. Hang in there and dont be so dang hard on yourself.


Laurie

anonymous

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