Hit me on the head with a brick, please

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Hit me on the head with a brick, please
13
Wed, 11-12-2008 - 10:04pm

OK, so I had a date with this guy, he did all the right things, called when he said he would, made a second date, blah, blah. It's all good. He is my clone who happened to be born in another country. Same viewpoints on EVERYTHING, it's scary. Sooo easy to talk to.

So I vow I will do all the "rules", keep him at a distance, not call, yada, yada. So what do I do on the second date???? OMG, what was I thinking? I got totally caught up in the moment. I had stopped at his place so we could meet and go out, we wound up sitting, talking for a couple hours...you can figure out the rest. While I don't regret doing "it", I totally regret doing it so soon. Now I can't figure out what I want to do next. I didn't want to give the impression that I am after some casual fling, yet my actions seem to speak otherwise.

He wanted to go out and have us get something to eat afterwards, but I needed to get home to the kids. He walked me to my car and then talked about him coming up to see me, making some plans for the weekend, etc. But now I am waiting it out, trying to figure out if he was serious or just "saying the right things". I so did not want to put myself in this situation and for the life of me I can't figure out why I did it. OK I know WHY I did it, I just can't figure out why I didn't do what I promised myself. Now I feel completely poopy, not about this guy, but about ME!!!

I can't figure out why I can't do this dating thing. I think there must be something wrong with me! Some women can't keep 'em away, I can't keep 'em!

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2002
Fri, 11-14-2008 - 12:33pm

same here. i slept with my second husband on the first date too.... just got carried away. i always enjoyed having sex with him even when he made me mad. that was kind of a reaction to my first husband who i didn't like having sex with much... let's just say i'm hoping to find a better balance the third time around.


it's all good.


startingover, glad to hear you are feeling better!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Fri, 11-14-2008 - 5:06pm
Thanks for the nice thoughts. I don't feel so bad now. I realize that my life is so friggin busy since the ex is ripping me off on CS, that I haven't had time to even THINK too much about what happened. So the less I think, the better I feel. He did call me back yesterday and we played phone tag. He's sick (can hear it), so I don't expect to see him soon. At least I got the call back with a request to call him back, so who knows?
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2008
Mon, 11-17-2008 - 1:12am
Ready for a confession/reason I am not going to hit you with a brick on the side of the head. For one it would do no good. For two, at least it was your second date.
First I just want to say I had rarely ever kissed a guy on the first date in my whole life. But when DF and I had our first date it was at his house and one thing led to another....
anyhow I stayed the whole night and for lots of nakie time (I'm talking at least 8 times) and he made me French Toast. And I didn't regret one second of it then and I don't now. At first i tried to justify it with the fact that we are friends and knew eachother a few months but I got over it fast. It felt good, I was really needing some amazing nakie time, he is the best I have ever had, and we ended up in this exclusive bona fide relationship.
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