Holding back just a little.....

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Holding back just a little.....
1
Mon, 06-18-2007 - 5:13pm

The weekend was pretty much M free as planned. I was horribly sick with strep throat, the girls strep throat and trying to get them ready for Germany. I went to his house and left him a card and a bottle of beer on Sunday night for Fathers Day. He remembered Mom's day when we first dated and brought me flowers and a card on my door step one very early morning. So I wanted to do the same. Then I had a feeling in my stomach that I should drive by and see how he was doing at the game. He asked me several times over the weekend to go, but I said no to all of the games (they played 4). The last one was almost over with twenty minutes left and I decided to sneak up on him. I could tell he was so happy and surprised. So I had planned to leave him and his girls for dinner and go home. Well after the game, his girls came up to him and told him they are leaving to be with their mom to spend the night, because they were going to be with her tomorrow night anyways and do some stuff with her. I suddenly could feel how M felt really hurt, but the guy he is, didn't let them see it and was left standing their. I felt really bad for him. It's Fathers Day, he spends all day on that darn baseball game for them from noon to evening in a blazing heat of 90+ and then they just leave him. He just looked lost and asked what I was going to do. I said: "spend it with a wonderful Father!". He smiled a great big smile. Then I kissed him and told him we'll meet him at his place. The card and beer where already on the door step, so when he got their, he was sooo happy and excited. It was German beer. LOL.
Anyway, he took out his lawn chairs and opened up some beer and we laid on the chairs to watch the sun set and the fire flies. We talked and talked about a lot of things. It was really pretty wonderful. We just really re-connected. But you know WHAT?

That breather that I took, really did a LOT of good! I so seriously needed that! I have decided to do more stuff for myself this summer and not spend every moment with M as I have, and have planned. I started to feel unappreciated, but alot of that was because I was going over the top and doing too much. Their just wasn't a need to go extreme. I wasn't being myself anymore. I was trying to be superwoman and in the process wearing myself out way to thin. It felt so good to just spend sometime doing nothing but resting and getting my chores done. We are headed for a weekend to Florida this weekend, but after that, I think I am going to hold back a little more and let him miss me more; and let myself miss him more.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Mon, 06-18-2007 - 7:55pm
GOOD stuff!!!!!