How do I ask this?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2006
How do I ask this?
3
Mon, 10-08-2007 - 10:49pm

I am new to this particular board and wanted to ask

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 9:07am

Ok my first comment is you are not old by any stretch of the imagination. Most of us here are 40ish. After all we are single moms. There are some younger women here as well, but I think we are mostly late 30's early 40's. Lots of life left to live.

If you want it, go for it. Tell him. I don't see any harm in it. I haven't really had any kind of a relationship like that ever. I have done it once or twice with someone but never had an ongoing thing. There are ladies here that do so maybe they can be more help in this arena.

Welcome
Priscilla

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 12:58pm

I have very little experience in the FWB catagory and that's because in my past if turned to sex, he no longer felt like just a friend to me. My emotions got involved and no matter how much I wanted them not to, they did. There is even a chemical thing that happens to us as women..there is a hormone release during sex that triggers a bonding feeling to the man. Some women can overcome that feeling. I never could. Have you been able to seperate your feelings from sex before, or would this be your first try at doing that?


Your friend might instinctively feel how things could change between you two. If you value your friendship there is a risk of changing the dynamics and losing what you have. But if you've thought it over and you think it's worth it, there would be ways to move forward if he is wanting the same.


~Pacific~

~Pacific~
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Tue, 10-09-2007 - 4:05pm
I agree with this 100%. So I have no recommendations for what to do. I think if I was going to go the route of FWB I would maybe try to find a date that agrees to monogamy and this situation - but not a friend because I think you will ultimately lose the friendship.