How Long?

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-17-2003
How Long?
13
Fri, 11-16-2007 - 8:02pm
I was just wondering how long everybody has been single? I have been divorced for 5 years after being married for 21. Yesterday a friend laughed and told me I was too picky about men. I laughed and reminded her that after being married most of my adult life and in an unhappy marriage for quite awhile that I AM picky. Although I try to think of it as knowing what I want and don't want!
Stephanie

Pages

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Fri, 11-16-2007 - 8:19pm

Oh Steph, I know you haven't been too picky at all - I remember many of your posts about having to kick a bad one to the curb.

Dating in midlife is very hard. There are so few choices. And it is hard to meet people. And we are all more set in our ways and have situations that are not compatible. Lifestage, lifestyle, life circumstances, kids, all that jazz.

The important thing is to be picky about the right stuff - and to let the small stuff go. Each of us knows what is big to ourselves.

I have been divorced for 6 years after being married for 10. I had a patch of 4 years without a date. In that time I spent a lot of time working on myself. It is necessary after a divorce.

Huhnee - this is what you have all of us for - because the married folk our age don't get what this is like.

Just be all you can be - and get out a lot and meet as many people as you can. Make it easy for MrRight to find you - and he will. He will!

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Fri, 11-16-2007 - 9:32pm

I've been divorced for about 5.5 yrs after being married nearly 7 yrs. And out of those 5.5 yrs, I dated one guy a year, another for 6 months, then took a year off completely from even TRYING to date, then I've been with my Hiker for 2 yrs.


~shrimpy

~shrimpy

"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.

~<

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Sat, 11-17-2007 - 2:08am
Threw the jerk out in Feb 05, divorce was final in May 06.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2006
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Sat, 11-17-2007 - 10:33am

I filed for divorce 3/04 and it was finally official 12/05 after a 21 year marriage and 30 years together as a couple. I had never actually dated before so I had decided to just look at it as fun but no expectations. I was perfectly OK with being single for the rest of my life. Had a 3 month fling, then met M in July 06 and we've been together since then. I guess I'm not destined to be a truly single person. I spent the time during the divorce process (since it was forever, and my X is still litigating custody issues) working on me, going to counseling, starting back to school.

I wasn't at all picky when I was in the dating mode because it was all new to me and I wasn't looking for a relationship. Besides, after 30 years with Psychoboy, nearly anyone who could hold his temper seemed great to me! If I had been picky I would have passed on M as not fit enough, I like my men long and lean. LOL. M is tall but could lose about 15 lbs.and do with a few million sit ups. But he has turned out to be just the right man for me for who I am now, and what I want and need from a romantic relationship.

QueenBun

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-10-2007
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Mon, 11-19-2007 - 10:11am

I have never been married--have 2 kids with 2 Dad's (long stories!)

April

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Mon, 11-19-2007 - 10:35am
I was married almost eight years and have been divorced 1.5 years.
 
Avatar for mom2maggie
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-29-2003
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Mon, 11-19-2007 - 11:06am

Not very long.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2002
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Mon, 11-19-2007 - 7:20pm

Ive been divorced since Oct 06...

Seperated from ex in Nov 04 after only 2 years of marriage...

I spent the two years of seperation focusing on myself until the divorce was final... I've only been back in the dating scene for the past year....

I'm not picky about who I will go out with at least once.. but i've been very picky about who i get serious with.. and I have NOT gotten serious with anyone in the past year... I'm having TOO much fun being single anyway...

Loonybunny

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 3:21pm

Hi - I was single for 2.5 years before I started going out at all.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2007
In reply to: texas_mom1991
Tue, 11-20-2007 - 4:16pm

Been divorced for seven years now.

Pages