I Can't...

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
I Can't...
5
Mon, 12-26-2005 - 1:34am

I just can't do this. How much more can I possibly take?

You all are right, I have to let my dd go tomorrow. Six whole days away from her - I'm dying inside. I had a huge fight with my exh - which doesn't make it any better.

I've tried to explain to my dd that she has to go for 5 sleeps, but she just wraps her arms around me and cries "no, mommy, no." How can I make her little 2 year old mind understand that I'm not leaving her, that I don't want her to go, but that I have to?

I've written my state rep about this whole matter with the divorce decree and visitation schedule. I have an appt. with the judge that hasn't signed the decree on Tuesday. I have also written my states bar assoc. about my lawyers behavior on the diovce matter and the whole "no need for cash" ordeal.

I'm dying inside!! What do I do about my dd?

Kait

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
In reply to: kaitlyn02
Mon, 12-26-2005 - 4:44pm

The only thing you can do is keep busy and pray the 5 days go by fast. Your exh might bring her back early - or create another scene to add to your legal report that is going to alleviate this problem in the future.

A 2 year old is very resilient. Explain 5 sleeps - and tell you she gets 5 prizes when she returns to you. (You can pick out stickers, sweet tarts, etc.)

That is the best you can do for now. Just hang in there. I am so happy to read how you are getting all of the legal fighting done that you can now. Don't give up.

I think that your exh will get sick of this soon enough and he will start to flake on taking her. Just have faith.

What on earth did you fight about with the exh?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-09-2003
In reply to: kaitlyn02
Mon, 12-26-2005 - 5:21pm

My ex-step mother-in-law and I have a somewhat civil relationship as of now. I've spoken to her many times, the last time being when my dd came home with the infected dog bite. I called her last night to discuss my dd's medication she is on and the new cream for her sensitive skin. However, my exh got on the phone. I didn't call where my number wouldn't show up b/c I'm sick to death of having to hide everything. If I want to talk to my dd this week they should know that it's me calling. I figure he it doesn't matter anymore anyway, you know. First, I have the r/o that won't allow him to call me directly. Second, when the decree is finally sent, I have to give him my number anyway. Third, if something happens to dd while she is away, I want ex to have all of my numbers to be able to reach me, which he probably wouldn't anyway.

Anyway...he got on the phone and called me a stupid f- c- b/c he has my phone number now. I told him that I did not call for him, that I am allowed legally to call if I have info on my dd, and what exactly did he have planned for this 6 day period with dd. He started yelling, which in turn made me angry. I told him that I have no problem with the temp visitation schedule, but if he left her for days on end again, I had every legal right to come and get her (and I will).

That didn't sit well with him and I ended up hanging up on him. I probably shouldn't have called for my ex smil, but I was so upset with the fact that dd had to leave.

I'm not really worried now though. I'm going to the court house to talk to the judge tomorrow. If he signs the papers I can legally go get my dd. I have also learned that my exh's license is revoked and he has a warrant out for his arrest. I'm not happy with that, especially since he's driving around with her. He has missed 2 court hearing regarding the matter - what a moron. They are revoked due to his 2 DUI's.

I have to get her other med records for the doctor's on Wednesday. I will be taking them to the police and filing a complaint, especially since the ER doc's med reports states "severe genital trauma." I've given those to my lawyer, who doesn't seem to care. THIS is why I'm REALLY scared for my dd. I'm also taking the records to my local DFS and filing a complaint with them.

I'm scared - I've had a migrain all stinking day due to all of this stress. I can't stand any of this. Just b/c my dd is not physically here with me doesn't mean that I'm not worrying about her and thinking about her. I have to get something done, and I'm trying in every way that I know how, but it just doesn't seem to be working. I'm also firing my lawyer and getting a new one. I have an appt. with another one tomorrow (well..a consulation). Since the whole divorce thing is paid for no one will actually be taking over where another atty left off, so I will be seen now, so I was told.

Just keep us in your thoughts and prayers please!
Kait

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
In reply to: kaitlyn02
Mon, 12-26-2005 - 9:13pm

Kait,


I'm really proud of how well you're dealing with everything.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
In reply to: kaitlyn02
Mon, 12-26-2005 - 9:47pm

Well bingo - those DUIs, along with the warrant for his arrest are his ace in the hole.

Make sure you have documentation for all of this and talk to the judge. Don't hesitate - keep at it. Tell the lawyer, too.

AND DON"T talk to anyone else in his family. They will just use it all against you. You have to run a clean course right now.

Keep us posted!! I hoep you get it sorted out very soon. Just don't give up.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
In reply to: kaitlyn02
Mon, 12-26-2005 - 10:00pm

I agree with Judy about the DUI's and warrant.


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