I met an interesting one... opinions?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2008
I met an interesting one... opinions?
Sun, 06-27-2010 - 3:00pm

This is going to sound strange maybe.. but I met someone that is just really normal! I mean.. its odd to me. I am used to having this massive chemistry with someone, or I'm just not attracted to them or vice versa.

This guy though.. I'm attracted to, he's hilarious, zero drama, in the exact same place as I am in life/divorce, wants the same things but we're on date #3 and I still don't have any chemistry.

We're doing dinner tonight, and I think I might need a real kiss lol. I keep getting peck kisses at the door. He's SUCH a good normal guy lol.

Ok so is this normal? Can that chemistry eventually come? Or maybe I'll find it in a real kiss?

Also, I don't feel like he really has chemistry for me. Like at the end of the dates I'm surprised that he's asking me out for another one.

I have no name for him yet, but I'm going to have to figure one out. We're supposed to be doing July 4th together since our kids are w/the x's.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Sun, 06-27-2010 - 3:59pm

A little over a year ago I dated guy SEVEN times, had a great time, he would call and talk for at least an hour at a time, we had mutual acquaintances, were from the same town, he had a great job, etc.

He never ONCE kissed me. A little platonic hug at the end of each date, maybe. I tried to make a move and he moved away. Then he called and left a message on my phone that he wasn't really able to date anymore...

Were we dating?

Anyway, I think that at the third date, I'd still give the benefit of the doubt. But I really believe that if a guy likes you he'd give a real kiss by now. I don't believe that too many red blooded males are that "gentlemanly" when they are into someone. I mean, he doesn't have to paw you and drag you into bed, but a nice "I really like you" kiss would be, I think, expected at this point. And appreciated on your end!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-30-2008
Sun, 06-27-2010 - 4:21pm

As long as there aren't strong turn-offs going on, I believe chemistry can come as you get to know someone...get to see their brains, humor, likes, dislikes, etc. Sometimes something like a simple gesture can be a HUGE turn on for me...and those things only come with time. So yeah, I believe chemistry can grow & develop. Just my two cents :)

Have fun. Keep us updated. Where did you meet him? I really, really need to get out there and put myself out into the dating pool...I'm just being lazy @ this point.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-28-2008
Sun, 06-27-2010 - 6:09pm

You should win a prize or something lol. Tonight was date #4, his idea, and he just totally 100% stood me up. After three hours I called, and got sent to voicemail after two rings. Haha.. subtle.

I'm just royally to'ed that my day revolved around this. It was an early dinner 4pm.. so it was right in the middle of my day. He also works like ten mins from here, so I had to be ready because he was going to come straight from work. Grr.. so I got all showered and ready, and stood up.

Seriously, these men just need to be polite at least ya know?

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2009
Sun, 06-27-2010 - 8:26pm

TJ, email me. Black* belt*mama*_99