I think we're dating...but I don't know
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| Sun, 06-24-2007 - 12:54am |
Okay, so apparently I've been out of the loop for a LONG while.
I met this guy through OLD and we chatted by email and phone for over a month before meeting. Our first meeting was spur of the moment due to me having kids and his job. It was wonderful. He's adorable and extremely funny. Usually at the point of first meeting, I find something wrong that makes me not want to continue.
That never happened.
We've made plans twice since then and have had a glorious time getting to know each other. He calls when he says he will. What? I didn't even think that happened anymore. He sends me random text messages just to say hi and that he's thinking of me.
Sure I'm elated. I've been down this road before. However before, something in the back of my mind would tell me that something is off. I don't feel that way with him.
I get my Negative Nancy pants on trying to come up with bad things, or reasons why he's not into me, or being completely honest. But truth be told he's countered all of those and surprised me along the way.
Last phone conversation we had was Thursday. We spent the entire day together after spending the entire night together the night prior. He wanted to get together again. He told me that if I was in the area to stop by. He lives a distance away. I told him that I wouldn't just randomly be in the area. He said he didn't know if he was up for company due to exhaustion and getting ready for his 4 day work trip Friday. I told him he was confusing me. He then said he was giving mixed signals. I agreed. He said he didn't want to give me mixed signals and if he did, to call him on it. In which I said, oh I will, I think I've proven that already.
I even opened up a bit to him telling him that I look forward to getting together because I don't like spending my limited free time with a lot of people. He considered himself lucky. He told me he'd call during his trip to say hi. I told him I looked forward to that. He said he was glad.
We ended up not getting together that night due to both of us just wanting some sleep.
I got an email yesterday saying hi and a text message today.
So what is this? What am I doing? My M.O. usually consists of one date and me getting out of the situation quickly. Am I being too hopeful? I mean, I'm still waiting for that bad feeling, a red flag to pop up.
Sometimes it's so much easier to have those bad feelings. Then you know for sure it's not good.
Blah. I'm rambling now.
Thanks in advance.
Shan

Hi there. This post got buried, and I'm only now finding it. Sorry!
I would definitely say you're dating, and a few months ago, I knew exactly how you felt.
For now, I'd say to just relax and enjoy this. There's nothing wrong with being on the lookout for red flags, but if you aren't finding them, don't do digging for them. You can keep your eyes open while still getting to know him and enjoying the moment. If something happens to come up, it happens to come up.
You can deal with it then. Meanwhile, don't pay interest on a loan you haven't yet taken out- what I mean is don't worry too much about red flags when they may never pop up. Extrememly easy for me to say, I know, but I have been where you are, and it's a great place to be if you stop to enjoy it instead of just worrying about the "what might be's"
Good luck, and have fun! Keep us posted, and stick around, this is a great board!
Moody, also dating
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