I took a step forward

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2007
I took a step forward
7
Wed, 09-10-2008 - 8:00pm

I am not dating right now (haven't really dated anyone since my ex although I went on a couple of "meets" last spring. I gave it up because I needed to get boundaries with the ex first. Well, there were a couple of guys with potential on eharmony that I got to open communication but let my subscription expire without notice to them.

I held on to the personal email and numbers they gave me thinking when I am ready I will reach out in hopes they would be available and interested. So tonight, I joined eharmony (one month) and saw where one had closed me. Wouldn't you know it he updated his pictures and looks even better and even has a dog (soft spot there). I sent a final message to him. Well, he responded right away. he called me out on dropping out but would still like to meet and gave me his email and number again. Oh....but he moved last month to South Carolina. Sigh...

I gave him my number (wow...can't believe I did that) and let him know I would like to talk and would possibly be interested in meeting when he is home visiting family (his family is still here and he comes home a lot) I figured at least it was a baby step for me.

Working up the nerve to contact the other guy. I noticed he has left me open.

edited to add: oh snap he plays in a band too!!! Another soft spot.




Edited 9/10/2008 8:09 pm ET by msmsavannah
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-06-2008
Wed, 09-10-2008 - 8:04pm
Very scary to make those steps. Even if nothing happens, at least you tried! It's good to make sure you get those ex issues out of the way before you move on. I gave myself a year from the divorce to even THINK about men because I knew I wasn't ready. Good luck!
iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Thu, 09-11-2008 - 11:35am
Way to go on the baby steps! See where it goes, and I bet you will meet some really intersting guys. I'm looking forward to your updates on what happens!
pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-11-2004
Thu, 09-11-2008 - 11:38am

Big "GULP" with ya on trying it...LOL im treading lightly and not expecting much...good luck sista!


M

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
Thu, 09-11-2008 - 12:26pm

I havn't had much luck with online sites but I think it does help prepare you for dating. For instance, when someone contacts you, you reply and then there is no further contact from him....when this happens often enough you find yourself saying "Oh well". I think it helps you get your feet wet. And you never know, you may meet someone.

I usually get online when I'm bored. Isn't that awful!! I'm on POF now just because it's free. Online dating does not work very well in my location and I've noticed that the men on pof are also on yahoo, match and another one called cupid. They're probably on others sites as well. It's a good time of the year to try online because soon people get cooped up in the house.

Good luck with it and most of all just have fun with it. If someone doesn't reply don't take it personally and just move on to the someone else.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Thu, 09-11-2008 - 1:06pm

Good for you!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-28-2004
Thu, 09-11-2008 - 3:25pm

Yes Ms. Savannah...you HAVE to share stories!!!

I had an onliner message me the other day but couldn't quite remember me. He had forgotten that I did call him, he half way acted like he wanted to meet and then kind of just blew me off! I'll just say I refreshed his memory. He AGAIN gave me his phone number and asked me to call him some time! Um, I don't think so! What a goober.

I'm debating to email a guy who's profile was very short and sweet. He very bluntly said that he's not looking for any kind of relationship mostly just an activity partner I guess. He lives in TN but comes to southeast missouri once or twice a month to check on his father. He said his 13 year old son for whatever reason had trouble with dad dating. The remainder of his profile reminded me so much of myself so I emailed him that I have found the male me. He replied back and gave me his yahoo id for future visits and also said he was taking his profile off pof.

We haven't corresponded in any way since. I don't have a clue as to what to say to him even if I did email him! I tend to rattle too much I think.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Thu, 09-11-2008 - 4:47pm
Good for you dear!!!