If you just realize.......

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
If you just realize.......
2
Sat, 07-05-2008 - 12:47pm

Spent yesterday with my ex dh and the kids for the 4th. We ate dinner, talked, laughed, saw fireworks, etc. I realized I LOVE my ex..........BUT...not in the way I did when we were married. He has turned out to be the best daddy I would want for our kids. They wrestled, tickled, played, did fireworks($200 worth)talked about just stuff...really paid attention. He layed in my back to when we watched fire works, he gave me the most gentle and wonderful hug when he left. I had a twinge of nostalgia and it really felt great to be in his arms. I knew when that happened WE could never happen again. I realized I have forgiven him for cheating..BUT I won't be able to trust him. I am learning to respect who he is. So, we will co-parent and be the closest friends w/o me crossing the lines of what ifs......I'm sad but still happy...not sure if it makes sense that way but it's all I've got!!


THEN about 11 pm MCDAD texted me...to tell me happy 4th. We bantered back and forth for

~Karen
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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Sat, 07-05-2008 - 2:13pm

Wow - what a story. I think it is good that you could come to that level of forgiveness for your exh and still appreciate what he has done as a dad for your kids - that is not a common story in this scenario. And it is great that he has stayed such a positive role in their lives and that you can work together as parents. But I am glad too that you listened to yourself and realized that you could not trust him after multiple offenses.

Sounds like it was McDad to the rescue!! Refresh our memories as to how all of that was left the last time - is he the one who made you feel that you were just a booty call and then you emailed him telling him you want more and he didn't respond or reassure you that he wants the same thing? If so, be careful!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-27-2006
Sat, 07-05-2008 - 7:10pm
Yes he was the one.....it's nice to be in the drivers seat with a man for a change ....MCDAD has all the qualities I want...he's a work in progress...and I know it's up to ME to do what I need to do for ME to be happy...that's one reason i didn't spend the night :)

~~Tiny


I love walking in the rain, because no one knows I'm crying..........

~Karen
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