I'm Back in the Saddle Again

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2006
I'm Back in the Saddle Again
1
Tue, 07-11-2006 - 7:32pm

I'm Back... I'm Back.... Ridin into town alone by the light of the moon....

So, hello, long lost post buddies! I feel like it's been forever since I've taken the time to actually post! So much has been going on, though, and I really wanted to share.

My dad had his BMT and is home again and doing well. While he was in the hospital, I was kind of going nuts, since Android was doing baseball, I was working, and driving three hours each way to see my dad at the hospital. Luckily, I got through it (thank heavens for good friends and cruise control, in life and in cars!)

I have dated a couple of new guys lately. Nothing serious, at least on my part, and I'll get into that in a second. I'm having a great summer so far. Android leaves Thursday to spend a week with his father. They're going camping, which he's super excited about. Princess Spasticka and I will enjoy the girl-time alone, but we'll also miss the little alien, I'm sure. I was hopeful about bying a house, but that fell through, so now I'm looking at moving into a rental now that my dad has pulled through and won't need me here as much anymore.

Okay, now for the juicy parts. First, there's a guy I met through OLD, which I've actually pretty much given up on. I don't check the sites at all, and my email is set to only notify me when I have an actual contact message, not a "wink" or "eye contact", whatever you want to call it. So, he contacted me, and we went out, and had the greatest time. I think I told you about him once, and since then, we've seen each other several times, but very casually. There has been no physical contact, which is so refreshing. We hang out, make each other laugh, and just genuinely enjoy each other's company. When my dad went into the hsopital, I cut all social activites, simply because I didn't have time, and since then, we've emailed a few times, but haven't seen each other. I'm hoping now to be able to reconnect, but since it was such a casual thing, I'm really not overly concerned about it.

Then, I met another guy at a wedding. It was actually his sister's wedding, and the bride is a friend of mine, and I'm very close to her bridesmaids. He is a very nice guy, but quite a lot older than me. I have some reservations, but am willing to get to know him and see where it goes. The issue I'm having is that he seems more into me than I am him, which although flattering, can also be rather annoying. He isn't at all pushy about it, but I always end up feeling rude for not wanting to drop my life to be with him. He doesn't have kids, has never been in a committed relationship, and I just feel like he doesn't get it- you know? He seems to think now that he's ready to be in a committed relationship, and has decided that I'm the person he wants to commit to, I should be on board, also. But since ALL I have ever been in is committed, serious relationships, I'm enjoying this dating far too much to jump into the first relationship that presents itself simply because it has presented itself. I'm not saying I don't want to be in a relationship, but I am saying that I don't think I want to be in a serious relationship with him. I've told him that, and he seems to understand me, but the next day he'll call and ask when we can see each other again. I've told him that spending time doing my own thing is much more important to me right now than any kind of dating, and I'm not willing to give up what precious little free time I have. I would love to spend time getting to know him, but (and maybe I'm being selfish here) only when I'm available, which isn't often. I just don't make plans at the last minute, and I guess I'm not into him enough to want to give up things I enjoy. The band, for instance, and my friends. We actually share a few of the same friends, which I thought would be awkward, but he's more like an aquaintance, and I'm very close, so that's not one of the issues I'm having, surprisingly enough. Anther part of me worries that I'm turning down Mr. Right because he doesn't fit the image I've always had... which is why I've told him I'm willing to see where, if anywhere, this goes, but I have tried very hard not to lead him on.

So, all in all, I am not worried about men, although I still would love to find the right guy for me. I know eventually I will, and until then, I'm meeting a lot of fun people. I'm also meeting and getting to know some women who are becoming better and better friends, which is wonderful. Work is going well, too, which is nice, and overall, life is good.

So, I hope everyone's summer is going well, and I promise, I will be better about posting!

Moody- sorry this got so long!


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Registered: 05-13-2005
Tue, 07-11-2006 - 9:33pm

Hey Moody,

Good to see you back and to hear your dad is doing well. A BMT is quite a procedure - very hard to go through I am told. You really were juggling a lot.

I hope you and the princess will indeed enjoy the girls time alone. And that your little guy enjoys his camping trip. They sound like such cuties!!

Your dating stories are very good. You really have a handle on your feelings and your assessment of the situations as you describe them. I agree with everything you write. The older gentleman sounds as if he has put you off and you don't like him enough to make time for him. I think the further you go the more you will feel this way - but you are right to try to give it a chance and to be honest with him.

Keep us posted - good to have you back.

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