I'm so happy!!!
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| Wed, 10-04-2006 - 11:46am |
I think I have possibly met "THE one". It was totally unlike me, but I saw this man on a dating site, and I emailed him last week....at first I really wasn't expecting much out of it, but just something about him REALLY stood out to me, so I just had to message him. He emailed me back, and we have been talking a LOT on msn, and on the phone. He's absolutely EVERYTHING I am looking for, and vice versa. We just completely click. We met the day before yesterday, and went out for coffee, and dinner, and then went back to our seperate houses and talked on the phone for 5 hours (until 2 in the morning!), LOL. Everytime I talk to him I get the worst case of butterflies, and he's always really nervous too, LOL. I totally know, and can tell when someone is fake, but this guy is GENUINE, and has outstanding morals. He's so funny, and sweet, and very handsome (but not full of himself at all).
He's a single dad, and to be honest I was VERY skeptical of single dads at first. I always kind of wonder....what was the reason you broke up? I always wonder if they did something horrible to the mother. But he was very upfront with me about why he left, and he left her for a lot of the same reasons I left my DF....because they were NOT family oriented, and didn't take care of our kids with us, or want to spend time as a family....so we left for the sake of the kids after spending considerable time trying to 'stay together for the sake of the kids'.
I HONESTLY feel like I know this man more than I ever knew DF. I can talk to this man about anything, and everything, and with DF I just kind of existed (hardly, LOL).
So my only concern is.....this is one of the first guys I have dated since me and DF split. So in a way I have it in the back of my mind that 'what if this is just a rebound thing for myself'. I have to say that I HAVE had rebound relationships in the past, but always I could tell right away that it was only a rebound relationship, this time it feels COMPLETELY different. But I still can't help having this stuck on my brain, that maybe this is a rebound and I'm just not aware of it this time. I'm not going to rush into anything with this man, but I still really feel he is my soulmate. I NEVER EVER could see myself growing old with someone, but I can with him. I can't say I love him because that would just be rediculous, but I can't say that I'm only infactuated with him, because that's not true either. I was intending on just playing the field, and I wasn't seeking out something long term really either, but I just can't let this man go, because I feel an amazing connection to him. I know he feels the exact same way. I'm thinking with my heart AND my head on this one, and I can't find anything that tells me not to feel the way I do about him either in my heart, or logically. We want ALL the same things out of life, have the exact same idea of what a family should be, what a spouse should be, and we have COMPLETELY compatable personalities, and are very attracted to eachother physically and mentally. We haven't kissed yet either, but I want to so badly, and I know he does too.
My ex tried to sweep me off my feet, and I could tell right from the get go, that there were a lot of things that didn't click with us. This man doesn't have to try at all....he's just himself, and I TOTALLY adore him for who he is.
I'm just so excited to see where this will go. I just didn't think I would find someone so fast, and although it does feel 100% right and natural, I can't help second guessing myself. This is NOT a man who I would ever want to hurt in any way, shape, or form....and that's the only reason I'm scared that I'm rebounding without knowing it (even though in the past I have ALWAYS been aware of what I was doing). Although me and DF stopped living together about a month ago, we were "over" over a year ago, and I have felt single for a very long time (not bitter single, just single). I'm not worried about myself, because I have NO doubts about this man.....I also really have no doubts about the way I feel....

dryginger_007,
I like what you write about him. However, I do caution you to slow down just a bit. Because you just broke up with a DF (I am assuming dear fiance). So you are going to be vulnerable. I like that he is a single dad and that you two both have good family standards and a connection on that.
So just be careful. Keep it slow.
And keep us posted!!
Ya I know I could be vulnerable and just not know it (that's what I keep thinking), and I am keeping it pretty slow (and intend to for a while). It's just almost impossible not to have a strong connection with him though. In the past if I felt something was 'off' I would often try to slow down my emotions, or even sabatoge it a bit.....with this guy I just couldn't do that, he's just genuinely what I've always wanted. I'm NOT saying that I am in 'la la land', and this man is perfect, I'm just saying that there is really something there that just makes me feel he is the one for me.
It's odd I just went through the breakup, but really we have had NO relationship for over a year....no feelings, no anything. My ex isn't a nice person, but at the same time I had absolutely no caring for him the past year at all. When I left the relationship I didn't feel ANY pain at all, because I prepared for it, and healed for over a year before I left. I took that whole year to do a lot of soul searching, and determining what I REALLY want in a man, so in a way I actually feel so much more grounded, and have a clearer view than I've ever had before....if that makes sense?
With this man yes we have talked about how much we like eachother, and all that.....but it's FAR from all we talk about. I love the way we talk, and the way he thinks, and his morals, and values, and how genuine he is, and generally I just get a very good vibe about him. The one thing my ex really showed me is what a fake is (I knew it from the beginning as well, and admitted it to friends that there was something up with him, and at the time I got together with my ex I was in a bad spot in life...he was a relationship I should have bypassed, and I was going to but ended up pregnant and then stuck it out).
And also I'm not saying that I'm putting all my eggs into one basket so to speak. I just want to give this a chance because for once it actually does feel 100% right....so far. I'm not at all desperate to get into a relationship, and wasn't actively seeking one either, but this just came to me when I least expected it. When I finally left ex, I thought eventually I'de play the field (and was looking forward to it), and not get tied down to one person. But after I met this man, I just feel like if I did that I wouldn't be being true to myself at all.
It will be interesting to see where this leads.......