I'm so tired of men!

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
I'm so tired of men!
4
Mon, 10-17-2005 - 10:51am

Are there any men out there that are worth it?????

My ex-boyfriend and I came to words Friday, he keeps trying to stay in contact with me even though I have asked him not to, asks about my son and me and my family and even went so far about a week or so ago to tell me he still loved me and how he was so sorry for how he had treated me. I finally told him that I didn't want to speak to him ever again. this morning, I end up with a message saying good morning how was your weekend.

My ex-husband (who was verbally and emotionally abusive in our marriage) mouthed off sunday while at our son's football game and made me cry. of course, he ended up saying that I didn't know how to take a joke. and if I had a sense of humor, I wouldn't be offended by him.

The guy I've been dating seems to be worth it. We saw each other again Friday and then saturday he called me bright and early to come to breakfast. We ended up getting the breakfast to go and eating it on the couch while watching tv. We jumped on the trampoline (which is actually very much fun and lots of exericse) and talked and just had a wonderful time. He called me Saturday to discuss a football game and then late saturday night (while he was out with a bunch of friends) to tell me he was thinking about me and good night. we talked again yesterday too. (just like normal talking everyday). One of my friends keeps telling me that he is going to get tired of me and move on with some other girl that he may or may not be talking to right now.

I keep getting told by everyone that the right guy will just one day walk in and we'll fall in love. But I have my doubts! I'm happy with myself, my life, my job, my house, my son! Everything! I just have always had this idea that I'd find Mr. Right and he'd be wonderful and love me and I'd love him and we'd have our disagreements and neither of us would be perfect, but we would weather through it and be happy.

Is that all just a fairy tale dream? I've been told I am a hopeless romantic, but is that a bad thing? with every other aspect of my life being good, is it too much to ask for to find a good man too?

Thanks for listening! Just melancholy today!

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Mon, 10-17-2005 - 5:26pm

Sorry to hear you are melancholy.

I think that if you get it in your head you are worth it - and you hold your standards high - then you will find one that is just right for you - and worth it to boot!

Are you okay with the fact that the guy you are seeing now left you alone on a Sat. to go with his friends? I was just curious about that.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 03-16-2004
Tue, 10-18-2005 - 9:25am
only slightly okay with it!! lol We are dating, but we both have discussed how it is not an exclusive relationship (except when it comes to sex) and that going out with friends is perfectly fine. The more I talk to him adn the more we go out on dates, the more I want him to decide to give up going out without me, but as of right now, we both are still relationship free. I've never been in a situation like this and he never has either and we are learning lots and lots about the each other and have figured out that we don't like going for long periods of time without talking or without seeing each other. it's a unique situation and I'm still not 100% I'm okay iwth it or not.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
Tue, 10-18-2005 - 3:03pm

You are in a sexually monogamous relationship with him, but he is not your boyfriend? I would not be okay with that at all. He's not invested in you emotionally. He's not committed to you.

It's easy for a man to say that he won't sleep with another woman. You satisfy his sexual needs and you make it easy for him. He doesn't have to see you on a Saturday night. He'll just come around when he wants to. He's so not worth it!!!!

Find a man who only wants to sleep with you and who would rather spend Saturday nights in your company.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-21-2005
Fri, 10-21-2005 - 12:18pm
No such thing as fairy tale endings. I see your the victim of growing up watching Walt disney films too. Who would have ever thought that those sweet little stories would end up supporting such a large therapy and anti-depressant market. haha I have decided to write a list of the attributes that a man must have to satisfy me (its harder than you think to write them) if I cant identify Mr. Right from the list at least I'll identify Mr. wrong quicker and not waste my time. hang in there, believe me a lot of us are in this same boat. Dawn