Input? A guy's perspective would be +++!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Input? A guy's perspective would be +++!
27
Sat, 07-05-2008 - 2:00am

To not fill this up with SOOO much background but to give a little bit so this all makes sense:
-about 8 mths ago, my license plate was stolen and the Cst who handled the case was cute, friendly and flirty. I was dating someone at the time (which he subtly fished around or so I thought) so that was that. The thief was caught, Cst. Cutie called with a final update and I wished him well and left it at that.
-a month ago there was a

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Sat, 07-05-2008 - 3:42pm

I think you nailed it teddybearmike. OK, I admit, I hashed it out with my older sister this afternoon LOL And she said almost word for word the same thing. Chances are, because work email is not privacy protected, he answered back formally because he had to. And I admit it only dawned on me today that he can't go out with me if he's handling a complaint for me etc. Total conflict right? DUH on my part.


So that sucks. I did end up emailing him back a neutral (thanks for the advice everyone, West I used your wording!) and this is what I put:
____________________________________
Well she's a renter here from what I understand, so she'll be around even
after summer ends.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2006
Sat, 07-05-2008 - 3:43pm

TBMike brings up a good point, the guy is at work and his job probably has rules against meeting people for romantic relationships through work. But I also agree with the advice to let him take the initiative. He knows you are interested from the communication you've had so far. He knows where you live. He can find a way to contact you outside of his work life if he is so inclined.

QueenBun

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Sat, 07-05-2008 - 4:00pm

I agree. It's up to him now. My understanding, which is only a loose understanding based on heresay, is that it makes sense if he's working on an active file on my behalf, we can't get involved. that makes sense. As for relationships through work, I don't think that's so much it as a friend of a friend dated an officer for over a year when he worked on a B&E case for her. I only assumed they got together after the case was closed, but flirted or what have you in between. I don't know that part. So I definitely left it in his hands. If he's interested and able, he'll contact me. Hell, he has my file, like you say he knows where I live lol has my home phone # etc.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
Mon, 07-07-2008 - 7:33pm

I got an email back from him earlier today! I was really convinced that nothing could happen because of the situation, so I was very surprised to get this from him today:


_____________________________________________
If you are ever up to it, I could drop in sometime after the kids are in bed when I'm on shift. I could even bring coffee. I work tonight and tomorrow night. Anyway, I'll check my e-mail later tonight. Till than.
D*****
_____________________________________________


This is pretty exciting for me as I haven't asked someone out before LOL I'll keep ya'll posted.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Mon, 07-07-2008 - 7:50pm
OH WOW - that is certainly unexpected. YOU NEED TO PUT THIS update and the story in a NEW thread - good lawdy!! It is getting HOT around here - how fun!!!!!!!!!!
Avatar for eponine365
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Mon, 07-07-2008 - 8:18pm
I'm loving this story haha.
"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married,
and by then, it was too late."
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Mon, 07-07-2008 - 8:41pm

I didn't get a good feeling from his first reply because he didn't suggest an alternate meeting, but I like that he showed an effort to get the time off for the concert.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Mon, 07-07-2008 - 8:49pm

That is so true: house = sex

BUT I was thinking since he is ON SHIFT and the kids are at home then he would not

but be on guard!!!!!!! ALERT ALERT!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Mon, 07-07-2008 - 8:53pm
Even on shift with the kids home- she doesn't really KNOW him at all at this point.

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Avatar for eponine365
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Mon, 07-07-2008 - 8:58pm

Yah, but he's already toying with the whole messing with a customer thing.. you'd think he'd be on his best behavior. I am all for the hanging around the house dates after the girls go to bed just to visit and hang out. Some can get hot and heavy yes.. but not all.


One guy even came over with a scrabble board.. I was like AWESOME!! haha.

"I never knew what real happiness was until I got married,
and by then, it was too late."