Interesting Thread on "Is It Meant 2 Be"

Avatar for cl_tcranky1
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2003
Interesting Thread on "Is It Meant 2 Be"
1
Sat, 11-27-2004 - 1:14pm

board
Thought some of you might want to check it out and maybe you have something to add.
All about expectations. I know we talk about that alot here.

http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlmrright&msg=3739.1

Enjoy!
Tara

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-21-2003
Sun, 11-28-2004 - 9:35am

I really loved that post. Opens your eyes to what you SHOULD be thinking.

Shane and I are like that. We do mutual things for each other. If he buys flowers for me, I'm not running for the florist to match that. I am genuinely appreciative for that and I know he's doing it because he wants to. Normally, he's going out to do that because I do a lot here and he's showing appreciation for it. Every morning, I get up with him and iron his shirt and make his lunch. After his shower, he always comes up behind me and puts his arms around me and kisses my neck as I iron. I don't iron because he EXPECTS it. I do it because it helps him get done in time to go to work. He can sleep a few minutes later if I do it and I don't mind at all.

He cooks Sunday breakfast, which to me makes up for ALL week of me cooking because he's a phenominal cook and always makes something great. He takes Dylan when he goes to the store to grab a few things we need so I can have quiet time to myself. All of this is in return for my staying home and cleaning and running errands and cooking and all I do. And yes, we say thank you when nice things are done.

Did I ever lower my expectations? NEVER! I was told once by my ex when we were still married that they were too high and that's why I was always unhappy. He was wrong. I kept them at the same level, left him, and met a man that has expectations just as high as mine and we fit. Yes, we argue and yes, we annoy each other and do things that are like fingernails on a chalkboard to each other, but do we put up with it? Absolutely not. Why? Because we know our limits and have expectations that surpass that kind of childish behavior and call each other on the idiotic things we notice.

The thing that we have over anything else is mutual appreciation. I genuinely appreciate his hard work and I know he values greatly what I do. And for that, I'm grateful.

Mel

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