It's over!!!! :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
It's over!!!! :)
6
Sat, 04-28-2007 - 11:55pm

Sorry Florence for keeping you in suspense. lol Things actually went pretty well. I found out from him that he almost stopped by my job Wed at 5 and came by my house so that I could give him an answer because it was killing him. WRONG things to do! Luckily I had things to do and he STILL had the nerve to ask me what I was doing! I told him over the phone that it was over. He took it well. He said a few things to me that didn't sit well with me. I had told him that I wasn't sure that I wanted to get married this year or the next, that I can't predict the future. I told him that if I never got married again it wouldn't be the end of the world. He said that he wished I had told him that sooner. And remember when he said he was 'joking' about getting married, kids, etc.? Whatever. THEN he said that he didn't mean to be ugly but that I wasn't getting any younger and neither was he. I told him it didn't matter. Did he think I was just going to change my mind by him reminding me of my age???!!! Idiot. He did break down and cry at the end when I told him bye.

I said that I would like to remain friends and not become enemies from this because he IS a nice guy but that is it. He still calls once a day now though. That's got to stop. I think he thinks there is still a chance. I cut him down at every litle hint he gives. I'm just going to not answer the phone when he calls because it can get ridiculous. He showed up yesterday to "check out my paint job". Did NOT appreciate that! The funny things was...I was watching Oprah and it was the episode on how/where to meet men 35 and over. :) Think he picked up on that? hehe He asked me today if my son had asked about him and I told him no....which was the truth. Like he was THAT detrimental in my son's life.... Now he just needs to find someone to replace me. lol

I feel like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders and I feel great! :) Thanks for everyone's support and advice. Looking back now I can see how needy and insecure he really was. Funny thing is, in my Match profile, I put that I wanted a guy who is secure with himself. lol I guess he overlooked THAT comment.

Jennifer

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-19-2007
Sun, 04-29-2007 - 3:45am

It was definitely the right decision then if you feel great and relieved!! And its reasurring, I am sure, that your son hasnt asked about him.

He probably thinks he was secure in himself....he was secure in the idea that you would want him desperately!! LOL!! And that you would rather SETTLE for him than face a life alone. I think we all faced that decision when we chose divorce over a lousy marriage. Hope he learns something.

Anyway, good luck with the next one!

--tj

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Sun, 04-29-2007 - 6:54am

Guys never read the profile! Sounds like you did well.

What did Oprah say about meeting guys over 35? TELL US!

Avatar for dani20002000
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-16-2000
Sun, 04-29-2007 - 9:03am

You definately made the right decision. He was way too clingy/needy from what you've written. Something you can now chalk up to a learning experience....I've had several of those.

~Dani~

 BabyName Ticker
iVillage Member
Registered: 01-25-2007
Sun, 04-29-2007 - 10:07am

Hey Jen, I'm just glad it went smoothly. I was just worried he would become a real pain and not let you rest and turn stalker boy,,I hope he stops bugging you soon..

I'm glad your feeling relieved,and you have your life back..

Florence

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Sun, 04-29-2007 - 6:55pm

Jennifer,


I'm glad you told him over, that must be a HUGE relief... now you just have to define "friends" to him...


I think you should be very direct with him that you would like him to leave you alone- that you're open to friends ONLY if he respects the boundaries of friendship.


Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 04-30-2007 - 4:27am

Where is the "Phew"! Icon?

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