I've decided to take on something evil..

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
I've decided to take on something evil..
35
Fri, 09-21-2007 - 2:59pm

a new FWB. I think I mentioned a while back that I was going to see my X guy that I had dated 18 months ago. He would sometimes just push my buttons for no reason, but the main reason, was because I thought his tattoos were really embarrassing (two unicorns on his back), but I remember in the aftermath thinking at some point it was really dumb of me.


Wellllllll, he's contacted me a few times a while back

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Registered: 10-07-2005
Sun, 09-23-2007 - 9:32pm

Lol Cat!


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Avatar for mhash
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Registered: 03-27-2003
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 12:44am

Does a FWB interfere with finding "the One?" I guess that depends. If I spend time with a FWB does that time and energy keep me from actual meeting "the One?" Could be.

If I had a ready made FWB and I can have at my beck-and-call and had nothing to do that day/evening then she would not interfere. I don't have such a woman right now.

I've been meeting and seeing these nice woman whom are great friends material. If I "worked it" then I could convert them into having benefits with them but all of them are not FWB for they are ones to only want a relationship with the sex.

Mark

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 5:35am
Good question - I was wondering that myself - how did that subject come up - that is funny!! Cat, it sounds like you have done this before and know you can handle it. The only thing I caution is that any time with an FWB is time away from developing a better social network. I know we all need comfort in times of dry patches. So I am not to judge - maybe just to caution that you are still spending time developing new activities and meeting new friends. Did you ever decide if you are going to go to TX?
Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 8:51am

We talked about our time together and he told me how fabulous I was and that others were very faded in comparison. I told him I was sorry but I couldn't remember if he was good or not. Then he said, maybe we need a rematch. I said, no, I think we may need more of a re-fresher course. And a little banter back and forth made us decide to give it a whirl. The hardest thing in all is making sure it really is a FWB and not just a one time thing. So we'll find out BECAUSE.............. lol, I went to see him on Saturday night.


Wooohooooo, he was HOT! He cooked a AWESOME dinner (he was a chef many years ago). I mean he really dished it up! LOL! And then we spent hours eating, drinking and talking. He has a MEGA bachelor pad. It has single playboy man written all over it. He upgraded on a few new items in his to die for house and one of those things was a enormous hot tub. So we spent another 45 minutes in his hot tub, some more great wine to go with it and then we headed for the bedroom.


AND NOW I

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2002
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 11:58am

i think you brought up a great point about NOT having sex with someone too soon because ya know you are getting that with the FWB... Like for me.. now i don't feel that ... i just wanna get laid feeling.... but instead want any new guy i meet to take me to dinner or something....


iVillage Member
Registered: 04-14-2007
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 12:14pm
I'm sorry, but I think FWB is super-tacky and a good way to end up with an unwanted pregnancy or disease, which is the last thing ANYONE, especially a single mother, needs.
Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 1:47pm

Everyone's opinion is welcome, but I think you are getting a FWB mixed up with a one night stand. A TRUE FWB is not a single fling. It is not just a guy you met and that is that. In 90% of the cases, it is someone you have known for a long time that you trust and know enough to have

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Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 1:52pm
Too each his own ... & different opinions are what make the world go round!

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Registered: 06-04-2004
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 3:23pm

Man, each time I read another post from one of you who CAN do a FWB and keep the emotions out of it, I am reminded at how I am just NOT the person who could handle a FWB!!! I know for a fact that I would just plain get attached!!!!


I love sex, but I love it with the cuddling and closeness that comes with it. Sex without the cuddling just leaves me feeling empty, and for that- I'd rather go without, or go with BOB only. I hate that left-feeling-empty feeling. I got that within my failing marriage and I hated it.


I am just SOOOO not a woman who could do a FWB!!! But I keep reading yall's posts about it because I'm curious just how you do it.


I do wonder though, Cat- why you are leaving it up to HIM to contact you again for another playtime? How come you can't get the urge for sex, and contact him? Wouldn't this be something that goes both ways, now that you've agreed on a FWB situation?


~shrimpy

"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.

~<

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Mon, 09-24-2007 - 4:32pm
GOOD QUESTION! The beginning is always a little bit complicating. For me, I still have certain rules for myself that work for me. The beginning process you can never be sure if it's a FWB for real or just a one night thing for them. So