ixnay - update from Mr. Cycle

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
ixnay - update from Mr. Cycle
12
Mon, 07-11-2005 - 11:05pm

Well Mr. Cyclist is in the pond. The poor thing did not pass the phone test.

First of all, even though he is only 38 and younger than me by 5 years, he talks like he is 65. And he wears his workout clothes twice. Somehow that is stupid and I maybe should overlook that - okay - but there is more.

He has been married and divorce twice or maybe three times - twice to the first and once to a woman who would fight and call the police. I don't like that drama - no wonder he put that he only wants dinner - he is definitely not over the last ex.

AND his son is entering the troubled teens - giving him trouble because of the last divorce. I hate to sound conceited, but my son is doing so well with his grades and his life - I don't want to have him around kids who are not. I have just worked too hard to get him and me to a good place.

No thank you. I don't need that drama or to play psycho-analyst to listen to all those problems.

NEXT!! or maybe a trip to the convent again.... I am starting to like my convent way too much after 2.5 years of no dating!!

I am frustrated today because there are so many kooks on the online dating scene. One guy took a picture of himself with his camera phone in the bathroom plus he put a pic of himself with a bare chest and boxer shorts. And another is into leather and sensuality and has 6 pictures that don't match. Still another lives 30 miles away in a penthouse on the beach and brags that he is 40 and never been married with no baggage. Another one has 2 small children on an auto mechanics income with a big country truck. And some other dodo said he would email me a pic if I send him more pix - now granted I have 3 on my profile and he has none.

Thank you for letting me vent - this is half in humor too. It is a jungle out there girls.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-05-2003
Mon, 07-11-2005 - 11:21pm

Judy,

I didn't have any luck with the online dating thing either. I wasn't comfortable posting a pic of myself there, so that eliminated a lot of people responding to my post. But I found that most that responded were quite pushy and eager to meet. Whereas I wanted to talk a little longer than actually meet someone in person- get a better feel of them, I guess. I had one guy who started chatting to me when I was logged in, sent me a pic and then started asking me what I thought of him. He wasn't my type, and I wasn't sure what to respond, so I just logged off LOL!

Another guy was sooooo eager to meet me, after emailing back and forth for about a week he was pushing so hard to meet before the following saturday. I finally asked why, and he replied, "well, I've been chatting with this other girl on here for about 3 months and she finally agreed to meet me this saturday, but you and I get along so well, I want to meet you first and if we hit it off, then I can tell her our good news". HUH?? Tell HER OUR GOOD NEWS??? I ended up not talking to him for 2 days, and then received a nasty email from him about how he didn't have time for games and I had seemed like such a nice girl, blah blah. I didn't bother talking to him again, nor explaining to him that I hadn't bothered responding to his email from 2 days before because my best friend was diagnosed with lupus and I was a little concerned. (She was misdiagnosed, by the way- phew!)

The last attempt at online dating was a guy who's son went to the same daycare as mine. I recognized him in the hallway one day by his picture and introduced myself. He was really excited to meet me in person, but I realized that he wasn't someone I could see myself dating. He was older (38), and had 3 kids- his daughters only a few years younger than me (I was 25 at the time), so I told him that I was looking for someone a little closer to my age.

After that I cancelled the account and gave up.

Met my current honey at his work (computer salesman).

Alison

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 3:42am

Aw darlin! I'm so sorry about the cyclist. I had to laugh though. I agreed with some of the baggage and red flags you were mentioning, BUT, sorry, still laughing. What is the problem with the wearing your work out clothes twice? Did you actually really see that as a criteria? LOL. Sorry, don't want to laugh at it, but I thought that was really funny.

I agree about the online thing. I have had my wierdos lately. They really get nasty if you don't respond right away, etc. And they are sometimes SOOOOOO pushy! It drives me insane. I have one guy that is getting so nervy, that I am getting ready to cut him loose. Something about a guy calling me darling after a few emails, is just not my thing. My name is CATHERINE, not baby, darling, sweetheart, babe.....
I think it's cute once your in a relationship, but NOT when I don't know someone. It just ticks me off.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 7:24am

Hey Cat - thanks.

The part about the workout clothes - that is certainly not in my criteria - the criteria is so bone thin - but anyway it just turned me off - here in FL it is so so hot and humid - I cannot imagine wearing workout clothes twice.

He just mentioned that in the conversation - it is so hot right now I can only get 2 days out of my workout clothes - he is some kind of aircraft mechanic and lifts weights at lunch in an unairconditioned aircraft hanger.

It is amazing what they will tell you when you let them ramble.

I guess you could say that conversation disturbed my psyche. Another flag was when I wished him a good evening he said - oh yea - what is left of it - and that is after he talked MY ear off for so long - what a way to look at a conversation with someone.

This morning I had a note in my box from a physician who doesn't want to post a profile because of his profession, although he did post the URL to a live interview of him. But he lives 2 hours from here. And I can't imagine he is going to give up his practice to be near me. I am not moving from here because of my son - so I hit the delete key.

I think that all of this has given me the strength and self esteem to delete delete delete and to know what I want and what I have to have.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 7:43am

Those delete buttons are real hot with me lately. Totally agree about the physician and the smelly cycle guy! Yuk and groess. N.C. is just as hot and humid, so I can TOTALLY relate now. It is REALLY amazing what men will say when you let them go on and on like a duracell battery bunny.

As you said, self esteem, self esteem and strength. I don't care if the man is a total loser. When he see's my photo and sends me an email, that I am a beautiful woman, I just think "Yup, thank you VERY much", then I will either write him an email to tell him he is not my type or just hit the no thanks-delete button. But it's just nice to hear. lol

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Tue, 07-12-2005 - 8:43pm
ITA about the work out clothes thing. Ick.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
Wed, 07-13-2005 - 10:33am
You have to have thick skin to do the OLD thing and keep your sense of humor. Good for you for tossing the Mr. Cycle back and deleting the "physician" who lives 2 hours away.
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2005
Thu, 07-14-2005 - 7:37pm

OMG, Judy..I also live in S FLorida and have just recently recently posted my profile on Match. We should compare notes on these guys!! LOL... Im 34 yo and I bet we have seen the same profiles and have probably received winks and e-mails from the same men!

Today, I actually had my first phone conversation, with 2 men that I've been corresponding back and forth with. I was so nervous!! Both were actually very sweet with really nice voices.. One has a "New York" accent that I just love (so masculine) and the other sounds kind of "preppy" (a little bit of a turn off)... But, all in all, Im so pleased that I forced myself past the "just emailing" stage..

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Thu, 07-14-2005 - 11:07pm
Oh wow - that is cool that you are here, too. Are you near Fort Lauderdale, by chance?
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iVillage Member
Registered: 07-10-2005
Fri, 07-15-2005 - 6:44pm

Actually, I live in Davie...Where are you located?

I just hung up the phone with another man that I've been corresponding with. He is also from New Yaaawk (just love the acccent..lol)and we spoke for about 45 minutes. He is really funny and it seems like we have alot in common. He wanted to meet with me tonight at some restaraunt/lounge in Boca Raton, but I chickened out!!

But, I did make plans with another man to meet for dinner tommorow night on Las Olas!! AAGGGHH... This is so new to me and I am just so nervous to meet up!! LOL..HELP!! How did you get past the initial case of jittery nerves???

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Fri, 07-15-2005 - 7:09pm
I just sent you an email, Tracy. We are practically next door neighbors. How fun to find another single mom so close!!
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