Just Broke Up - Have 2 Year Old Daughter

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Just Broke Up - Have 2 Year Old Daughter
7
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 8:24am

I just broke up with my fiance of 5 years and we have a 2 year old daughter.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 8:57am

Welcome. Sorry to hear of your pain - but it sounds like you made the right decision and will do good on your own for you and your daughter. When you put yourself first and do not do things that make you feel uncomfortable then you can never go wrong. Lying and a temper ARE deal breakers and you don't want your child to grow up with that. At least you don't have to deal with a divorce.

Okay - you want the answer - here is mine. Baby steps. Stop thinking about the past and focus on right now. Take little steps every day to put your life back in order. Get a good place to live. Work on your career. Enjoy your child and help/watch her grow. Be all you can be and make new friends. One day you won't think about him or the pain he caused - it will be a bright day and you will even be able to think of the good he brought into your life but you will also understand why it wasn't meant to be. And then something really good will come along.

You have a chance right now to have a clean slate and become someone better so you can attract someone really good. Don't waste it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 2:16pm

(((((hugs)))))


And welcome. I am sorry to hear about your break up. I wish I could tell you more and be of some help- but all I can really say is that somehow, someway, you manage, and it gets better.


There are many great folks hear who have similar situations and you will find out how much you relate. Honor your feelings and know you are not alone!


Welcome again, we look forward to hearing more from you :o)


~Pacific~



Edited 2/8/2008 2:16 pm ET by pacific_sun
~Pacific~
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 2:43pm
Welcome girlie!!
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Fri, 02-08-2008 - 11:24pm

Welcome to the board.


I'm sure you will feel helpless and bitter for a bit- I remember being SOOOO angry with MYSELF when I finally ended it with Nicolas' dad- angry that I stayed for as long as I did.


Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Sat, 02-09-2008 - 12:57pm
((((hugs)))) Sweetie. But from the little you have said, i think you have done the right thing for yourself, AND your child.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2008
Sun, 02-10-2008 - 1:41pm
I thank you all for comments - I was not home this weekend (went to a relative's house for the weekend to get my mind off of things) but have been checking your posts from my blackberry.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-21-2007
Mon, 02-11-2008 - 12:52am

Bitter is going to happen at times. Here are a few things you can look forward to:


1) All the decisions in your home are YOUR choices.


2) Go to bed when you want.


3) Now you have one child to focus on, rather than 2.


4) Want to buy something silly when you can afford it? Go for it.


5) Stop having to justify things you've done that he doesnt like. Now you have only yourself to answer to.


#1, rely on girlfriends if you have them. If not, go find some.


You can do it. You can do it well. Remember that your child needs you to do a good job at this, even when you are upset. I was all ready to move in with the 1st guy I dated after my ex who I'd been with since 16. He was a great guy, and still a good friend, but I was sort of using him like a teddy bear