Just need to vent it some where....
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| Wed, 02-20-2008 - 1:14pm |
Hi ladies, I've been more of a lurker than participant since joining, but really didn't feel like I had much to add most of the time other than the odd "congrats" or "way to go" type posts. I also post on another board on ivillage, wives of cops, but honestly, I feel so out of place there. Even tho I've been dating Mr.RCMP since Oct, I'm not his wife, and I just don't feel like I fit in there even tho there are other gf of cops on the board, not just wives. Anyway, I'm in need of a release to whine/vent LOL Things with Mr.RCMP are great still :) He is a really, really wonderful man (still haven't introduced the kids, he's all for it, I'm holding back not because of thinking things will go wrong, just a little hesitant to change the dynamix of the relationship and if I'm ready for that yet. He's great about it, says he's ready, when I'm ready.) Anyway, back to my reason to vent. I'm dating a very wonderful man and I'm still lonely. LOL Reason being his job is NOT relationship friendly. He's considered single still as far as the force is concerned so they take full advantage of it and send him off for relief duty a LOT sometimes for weeks at a time, our time together is very limited and while both of us hate this, its not fixable at this time. He has to get through his first year to gain any senority and then they'll respect stuff like him having a gf/life back home and not wanting to be shipped off to other communities all the time. So, because I don't want to vent on him about how lonely I am, how much I hate this, I'm here venting. lol I know some of you might be thinking, if the relationship isn't what you want or giving what you need, move on. And it's not that at all. I really feel like this guy is worth the wait, and when we first got together, it was perfect because I wasn't wanting a serious anything at that time, and he was happy I was willing to "put up" with him being gone here & there a lot of the time. It worked great, and its still great, but when he's in a community with limited communication (his police radio and thats it) I get mopey and try to find stuff to fill my time so I'm not blah when we finally do get to talk. So rather than write this all out to him, and have him worry and think (yet again) that he's going to be dumped because of his job, I'm writing it here, and hoping someone has a new trick/idea I haven't done yet to "suck it up princess" and move along with my day until we can connect again.
Now that we've been together awhile, I realized I really do want a relationship with him, and would love to see where this takes us and get a little more serious about us. Which is why these new "needy" feelings are bothering me so much. I don't know if this is even making sense LOL I'm just feeling blah because we haven't been able to talk for a long time and its frustrating we are both so "there" in terms of wanting to be together and make this work, and something that is making that hard for us, is also completely out of our hands to change right now. OK :) I'm done LOL

I see where you are coming from!
April
Ah yes, I can sympathize with you for once you have established a relationship and then deal with not spending too much time together.
What I'm doing for myself is work on being patient and focus on what I was doing before I got into my relationship with Cute Gal.
Awwww - that is sweet that you two are getting along so well and you both want to spend more time. I am sorry to hear his job is such a pain. But it sounds from what you write that there is light at the end of the tunnel and that his hours and schedule can get better over time.
Maybe it would help to try to find some more social outlets in the mean time. I think that as single moms we all tend to become more isolated because we need to be home so much with the kids and running them around to all of their activities.
I work in law enforcement, and that's what all my friends and BF do so I understand your issues. One thing that is very important for you to understand is that work is work. Two years from now, when he has "seniority" it won't matter at all
Hey sweetie (((((((HUGS)))))))