Last minute kind of people

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2005
Last minute kind of people
4
Sat, 01-13-2007 - 9:42am

I am a last minute kind of person. I am a single mom, and one of the things I appreciate about it is being able to change my plans without consulting someone.

I am starting to date a last minute kind of guy. Things seem just fine. He calls regularly, and often just stops by and we go for a walk or make plans with no time set and they happen when it is convenient for both of us.

This goes against some of the things I have read and seen posted about having plans made ahead and confirmed etc. I can totally agree with why this is important for some events and mayebe even for most events for some folks, are there other reasons for this to be important? Am I some how doing something injurious to the relationship by being perfectly comfortable with it?

Thanks!:)

BTW, I may meet this guys mom today... again, it's kind of up in the air and I'm okay with it. See what I mean? I should be a nervous wreck, the guys Mom and Gramma might stop by un announced, but I'm just fine...

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-08-2006
Sat, 01-13-2007 - 9:55am

Ubersilly, I think since you're fine with the way things are, there's nothing at all wrong with it.
The problem would be if one of you was a planner and needed things to be set in stone. I am trying to be more spontaneous in general. I find it difficult with kids, especially when it comes to dating, but I have mine full time and can't just get a sitter at the drop of a hat. But in other things, I'm working on my need for planning... overplanning can be a problem for me, since then if things don't work out the way I had planned, my life in thrown into upheaval.
I'm trying to be more of a go with the flow kind of person.
I think if you're both good with this, and you're not in a tizzy about this, that's a very good thing.

Moody, not planning anything specific today


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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Sat, 01-13-2007 - 12:28pm

It sounds to me like you are MORE than fine - he is calling regularly, stopping by and wants you to meet his mom!! And it if suits your style that is great!

When we say it is good that they are making plans in advance - it is more of a beginning thing - meaning the guy is showing respect for your schedule and not just calling at the last minute because he has nothing else to do - or calling late at night for a booty call!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-26-2005
Sat, 01-13-2007 - 3:39pm

Thanks, your words are reassuring. Things sure feel good.

I called early this afternoon to let him know that my son and I were stepping out to go ice skating and we wouldn't be around for a visit for a couple hours. He brought his Mom and grandma to the ice rink! We all had a good time either watching or skating. they are nice relaxed and unassuming people, just as I was led to believe they would be. I could tell he had talked to them about me quite a bit because they gave me very big smiles as looked me over thoroughly upon being introduced. Whew. That moment is over!

I feel pretty lucky to have found an attractive man seemingly capable of a healthy relationship about my age (39) who is available and interested. I hope things keep going well.

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Sat, 01-13-2007 - 6:34pm

"He brought his Mom and grandma to the ice rink! We all had a good time either watching or skating. they are nice relaxed and unassuming people, just as I was led to believe they would be."

THAT is HUGE - very good very good. I like what you write about him. Keep us posted and enjoy!! I am happy for you.