A little creeped out by this one...
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| Sat, 09-18-2004 - 4:14pm |
We have a great policy that would take care of the others if one of us died.
Of course, if Shane passes, he has nothing to worry about. I'd have Dylan and our baby and would always be there for them. But I was thinking. If I passed, Scott would get Dylan and I doubt he'd ever allow Shane to see him again. Even though Dylan would have a sibling through Shane. There really would be nothing Shane or I could do to insure that Shane got to be a part of Dylan's future. It bothers me.
Shane is a wonderful addition to Dylan's life and has provided stability and so much love. I can't imagine that Dylan would have to miss out on time with Shane if anything happened to me. Plus, my family would be out of the loop too as Scott would make sure his man-eating mother got the majority of the benefits and my parents would get no time.
How can I ensure that my family and Shane get to continue being in Dylan's life if I were to pass on for any reason? Or is it out of my hands to get an order for visitation should something happen?
Anyone know? Who knows what tomorrow will be like? And the conversation I had with Shane really made me think about Dylan's future and what kind of life he'd have. I'm afraid the people I love will lose their relationship with my little boy.
Sorry to bring everyone down, but it did cross my mind and I had to ask if anyone else has thought about this?
Mel

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Here is what I did: I set up all of my assets and life insurance beneficiary to go into a trust for Nicholas. My family would handle that trust so my ex would have to deal with them for the money. That is the best you can do. I also put in a clause that whomever he marries would have to sign a prenup waiving all rights to that money.
You cannot control the actions of others, especially after you are gone. But you also can't think like that because chances are good that you will live a long time.
Mel
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I guess your situation is different because your money would go to your spouse - unless of course you have a separate life policy with your trust/son named.
I am lucky in that a good friend from high school is an estate attorney and he did my will/trust - he did a good job and had really good advice for me.
But??? What if your son doesn't want his wife to sign a pre-nup?
Kim
His friend M was married to C. C has a son from her first marriage. M&C got married when son was 2. C died of uterine cancer when son was 14. During those 13 years M&C were together, son NEVER saw, talked to, heard from, received support from, NOTHING, his bio dad. Mom died, the state contacted bio dad, bio dad came to claim his son. M hired an attorney and they BATTLED. M lost. He got visitation with son that he has raised for the last 13 years twice a year, a week at Christmas, a week during summer. Bio dad took son and moved out of state. Son turned 16 - was emancipated, and moved back "home" and in with his "dad" - M. It was a nightmare, to say the very least. And this wasn't long ago. Son just turned 19.
If I should die - my oldest will go with his dad, and it's up to my ex whether or not my oldest will ever see TT, his brother, or my family. MY parents could petition the court for Grandparents' Rights, as there is such a thing in the State of Nevada, and since they have been the only constant in my son's life, they would be granted it. They could arrange to have TT and Alex there during their visits. Besides that, there is nothing I can do legally, at least not here in the State of Nevada. I'm in a weird situation, though, where my ex adores my husband and our son - and I think that bond would remain intact. I think. Scary stuff to think about and deal with.
Mindy
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Our situation is much like Min's.
Mel
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I think it's a hard topic to deal with, but like all other yucky topics, if you get yourself armed with legal information, then you can see how things could work out your way instead of just worrying about things. Surely if they are blood brothers, the courts would want them to have a relationship?? Anything else wouldn't make sense.
Here is what I did: I set up all of my assets and life insurance beneficiary to go into a trust for Nicholas. My family would handle that trust so my ex would have to deal with them for the money. That is the best you can do. I also put in a clause that whomever he marries would have to sign a prenup waiving all rights to that money.
West, that's what I did.
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