M, History and Jesus Sandals.......
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| Mon, 07-09-2007 - 9:14am |
Ok, so let me tell you what taking the High Road can accomplish.
You all know that after M dumped his stuff on my doorstep that I didn't respond to him about where his glasses were, etc. I just ignored the text message because I was so angry at him and disappointed the way he ended things in such a low form...
Friday:
I went to his office because M is on vacation and I knew that I wouldn't see him. I brought them to the reception desk and the guy who was at the desk took them and put them in a drawer. I told him to let M know, but I had a feeling that wasn't going to happen. It bugged me, because I didn't want M contacting me to find out where they were, so I decided I'd let him know Sunday night in a short FYI. So keep that in mind....
I went out with Mr. History on Friday night. I never get a pedicure, but I decided to take two hours off earlier at work and pamper myself a little. Afterwards, I went home and fixed myself up. I put on a white summer dress and a pair of white sandals to go with my dark tan. I have naturally curly hair that I straighten so I decided to let it go kinky and put on a little make up.
Mr. History picked me up and we went to a place overlooking a park for a few drinks. We just talked about all sorts of things, then he drove me to the Plantation home. It was so pretty and relaxing. The weather was perfect, so we sat outside on the wrap around porch for a candle light dinner.
What I like about Mr. History, is that he puts a lot of time in for others. He is a History teacher, but also teaches ESL and AVID (for ADD and troubled Teens). My two girls both have ADD and Alex takes AVID, so it was interesting to listen to him talk about the kids in his class. Then he also spends 20 hours a week in the summer and 10 during the school year with a one on one for Juvi teenagers. He acts like a mentor and big brother.
It'll be interesting to see exactly how much time he'll have for us. But that isn't important now.
Afterwards, we went to one of places that I have enjoyed going for Blues music and after that we went to a wine bar. So the night ended up being very late. We started out at 6:30 and I got home at 2am. Crashed! But not before Mr. History texted me to tell me he had a fantastic time with me.
Saturday:
I woke up at 5:30am to go to the beach this weekend. As I woke up, I noticed another text. It was from M! And it read: It's 3am in the morning and I can't go to sleep for thinking of you. I do miss you. If it matters.
- UM -......... Actually! No, it doesn't.....
Of course, I sent no response.
Packed my things and headed for the beach.....
Jesus Sandals said he would be on his best behaviour if he could just hang out and surf with me for the day. No discussions about us, etc. I said hesitantly yes.....
Met up with him and we had a good time and no serious conversations. Later on I went to visit other friends of mine and have dinner and stayed with my Aunt Dixie.
Mr. History sent me a text or two asking how I was. I sent him pictures of me and then he said I miss you and I should call him later. -UM- No. I decided it's ok for him to miss me a little. Don't want to just date him and give him that idea....
Sunday:
Moving right along... Sunday I woke up and went surfing again. Jesus Sandals (who got new and good looking sandals now.lol) asked if I would have brunch with him, so I said sure. We had brunch along the water and then afterwards I went shopping a little for myself.
I decided to head out a little earlier then usual, so I could get some stuff done around the house.
As I drove home, I decided to let M know where his glasses were, so I wrote him this:
"FYI, I dropped your glasses off with Mike at the Pepsi office on Friday." - nothing more, nothing less.....
A few minutes later he texts me this: " THX. I'm truly sorry about the way things worked out between us. I just hope that someday you can forgive me."
AND THEN I DECIDED TO END THIS STUPIDITY AND RESPONDED:
"You made a choice; live with it. As I said weeks ago: We were not important to you. No sweat, I've moved on."
O - U - C - H !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Needless to say, I didn't receive a response back. I felt SO good writing that and to me, it closed everything.
Still driving to Charlotte, Mr. History writes me a text: It's weird, I feel like I haven't seen or talked to you in a long time. I want to spend all of my time with you.
I responded with: That's cool, I enjoy my time with you. Call me later when you have downtime. Later.
THEN: A message from Jesus Sandals! (LOL, who WAS on his best behavior)
U trusted me again to be your friend, you can trust me to be your lover. You can search forever and never find anyone who adores you more and will try to make you happier than I will. Just listen to your heart. I will forever wait for you Catherine.
- OK - !!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Where does he GET this stuff????
I just wrote him and said: I don't know what to say. I'm speechless. I'll talk to him later this week.
Got home. Cleaned up the place a bit (side note: 5 cats can make more of a mess in a day then 2 kids).
Around 8:30pm Mr. History calls to talk to me and then I talked to him about 5 minutes. Told him I have to go find something to eat because my frig. is empty. He asked if I would mind if he tagged along and just watched me eat. LOL.
I said, sure, meet me.
So we met up for some wings and a few beers and talked. He asked me how many dates it was since we've met and I said does it matter? He said, yeah, kind of, because to him it seems like a dozen and I said, No, it's actually only been one and the rest were meet and greets. LOL. He looked a little put off, but I think he's trying to head where I don't want too: Exclusive dating.
As I left him (with a kiss), he wrote me and said he hated leaving me tonight and that he really enjoyed being with me.
soooooooooooo, that is my update.
I checked my emails this morning: 6 new winks and 2 emails. Not sure what to think about them. The winks I delete, but the emails I'll have to think about. Cute guys, but here I go again... Having trouble dating more then one person. DARN IT! That's ok, I don't have to date, but I don't have to let him know I'm not. I'll be ready, when I'M ready.
M sent me another email last night. Just a fun powerpoint with kittens, saying he thought I might like it. I have a feeling this isn't the end of him. :(
But of course, he will receive no response.
So that is the update............

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You can read my thread to Alison regarding my thoughts of Mr. History.
Hard to say when we'll see each other again. We haven't really made plans. SHOCKER I KNOW!! I saw him Sunday night and last night. Tonight, I have plans, he has plans and we never discussed when the next meet up will be thereafter.
I have a few other hits, but nothing that gives me the "it" factor. I don't know, I'm ok if I just stay home a few nights and get some other stuff done.
Priscilla makes a good point about the fact that he's just TOO into you!
Let me clarify. If you kiss then I would make sure to convey it is "just a kiss." I am always up for fooling around and kissing is great. I have a woman friend that she does not kiss unless it is for romantic purposes.
Myself? I love to kiss regardless. It's exciting, sensual and erotic. Kissing for me does not have to "go anywhere" or really mean anything for it can be the reason unto itself. However people interpret kissing differently on what it means.
Mark
The date ended up being ultra harmless. He didn't even talk about the next time we are going to meet up which is good. However, today he emailed me and said he would like to spend as much time with me as I allow him too. That and todays posts, started this conversation: I touched base with him about enjoying my time with him but that I wasn't sure if we were really a fit. Then I began to demonstrate examples on why I felt that way. How I evaluate his friends and the people and places he goes to verses me.
He had some great responses (so far I sense him to be an excellent communicator) and then he said "I" just really need more time and if I wanted too that he would be willing to just keep it to that because he has such a great time with me and just wanted to learn more about who "I" was, not just mom and career woman, but who "Catherine" is. He meant my true interests, being relaxed without worrying about kids and projects. I thought that was sweet and genuine. I often wished someone wanted to see past everything and get too know the true me, so maybe this is my chance with the kids being gone. M seemed to only see me as a parent, not as a woman.
Then he added that if I was interested, he thought a good way to get to know one another more, would be to go hiking and fishing this weekend. I love both; so does he. I very much enjoy nature and feel that is the element where I belong, so that is what we are going to do.
My take is that no need to be all hyped up on cutting and running so early in the process. I think there is tendency to put everything under a microscope to look for something wrong rather than taking in the whole, evolving picture of the person under differing circumstances as people get to know each other.
Mark
I am so glad that you are giving this guy a chance. I think he sounds like a really great, down to earth kind of person. The fact that he is aware of and accepting of your daughters is great. The fact that he wants to get to know the 'real' Catherine is fantastic. The fact that he has tons of friends I think also is a great indication of the fact that people love this guy. The fact that you were able to discuss your red flags with him and he had some good responses for you and wasn't at all put off is also a great sign. He sounds like a great catch to me.
I agree with Mark:
"My take is that no need to be all hyped up on cutting and running so early in the process. I think there is tendency to put everything under a microscope to look for something wrong rather than taking in the whole, evolving picture of the person under differing circumstances as people get to know each other."
Just have fun...enjoy your time and see what happens. There's no hurry. I might even suggest that, because he is a teacher and he is on break right now, he might seem more keen to spend time with you than if you met in once school starts up again (purely due to committments and schedules).
I agree with the others (and you) as I don't think people should be evaluated based on their appearance. My ex husband was the kind of guy that most women gasped and drooled over. He treated me like a third class citizen. The guy I am currently dating is not the most gorgeous outside, but I do think he rates right up there with Brad Pitt on the inside if you know what I mean - he is just an awesome person. The more I get to know him the more attractive I find him.
Have fun Cat...I love the fact that you are just going with the flow...whatever happens happens...can't wait to read more...I think you should start a blog on your adventures as a single dating mom!
Rose
Actually, he explained to me that he has alot of time on his hands right now, because he isn't teaching, but that it's going to be very different come August. College Football will start and he does the highlights for ESPN to make extra money and then of course school and being a mentor for the juvi kids. So I guess that is why he wants to spend as much possible time together now then to only see each other once the week or twice the week and then get stressed out with schedules when we have no time.
I am just going to sit back and chill and try not to get overly anxious and quick about making a decision; I like him, but time will tell. He's just extremely shy when it comes to me, but totally outgoing in others. It's adoring to watch.
Tonight I have something of my own going on with friends and he is playing basketball with his teacher friends.
We haven't set a concrete time regarding anything else this week, so we'll see. However....... it will be interesting to see how he reacts when he asks me out the last minute and suddenly I'm booked with another date. Which I think will be coming very soon.
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