Make a wish........
Find a Conversation
| Wed, 05-10-2006 - 5:35pm |
Okay, by now all of the regulars of this board know that I am picky picky picky - my delete key has a hairpin trigger - both for OLD and for IRL.
So I have my profile SHUT OFF.
But the other night I decided to put to "pen" what I really want - like "place an order for a guy in my head" - LOL: a nice educated guy near my age or a little younger since I am in GREAT SHAPE - just ran 12 miles. One who doesn't smoke or ride a motorcyle (I am afraid of motorcyles and don't want to ride one). Tall. My religion. I also want someone who is into cycling and who likes to travel. No drugs, clean cut look. Not separated nor in the over 40 and never been married category. Close by.
DISCLAIMER - PLEASE do not be offended if you are any of these or dating someone like this - this is an exercise for ME to be picky and really realize what *I* want!!
I put all of that into the search box and found someone who lives 5 minutes from here.
So I sent him an email explaining that I am apologizing for having my profile turned off but I just got too many crazy emails. I gave him a description of me - my age, height and weight and that I look like Princess Di (how is that for self confidence!) - and gave my profile text. I said I am always looking for a riding buddy around here in my city and just wanted to say hi. He wrote back right away saying he has some female friends that are on that site that do that too. And he is interested in knowing more about me and he explained where he rides.
The thing is, that it has taken me a lot of dating to figure out what is out there now and what I want and don't want - I am not trying to appeal to everyone just to get a date - am quite happy on my own. And don't want to settle to be in a relationship. For now I want to be friends - don't want to play the game of "is this the one?" - just want to know more people - go to coffee or for a ride sometimes.
I talked to him on the phone today and we will likely meet up next week.
So, we will see. Will keep you posted - but don't get your hopes up. I just thought this was a fun exercise to share for everyone wanting to get out there.
MAKE A WISH!

I think it is a good idea to know what you want and what you don't want in a man. I agree about the separated and over 40 never married thing. I also think it takes the pressure off to not think of him as "Is he the ONE"!
I can't wait to hear your update!
Stephanie
I honestly think more women (and men, too) should make such a list, with the things on it that really matter to them.
I think too many times, people end up "settling" (we seem to use that word a lot here) simply to be in a relationship. If we all had a list, and actually stuck to it, we could save ourselves a lot of time, misery, and heartbreak.
For instance, I have no intention of doing that, and have told myself I won't, yet I find myself agreeing to go on dates with men I KNOW aren't right with me before I've met them. It's not that I'm settling, even, necessarily, but it's nice to have someone to do something with for a change, or whatever. But, in the end, it just winds up being a complete waste of time for anyone looking for more than just having fun right now.
If I had an honest, in depth list the way you do, and actually forced myself not to settle for anything less than what was on it (instead of dating basically anyone who asked at least once), I'd probably flounder a lot less in this sea of love.
I hope your meeting goes well, and that if nothing else, you get an honest, fun to be around guy to ride with out of the deal. Please keep us posted, and have fun!
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