Married Friends?

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Married Friends?
37
Wed, 05-14-2008 - 11:27am

So, last night, I had book club.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
In reply to: mnmoon70
Wed, 05-14-2008 - 1:03pm

I have not, but I have to go to Barnes & Noble over lunch anyway, so I'll grab it!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2006
In reply to: mnmoon70
Wed, 05-14-2008 - 1:30pm

As SEV says (and I just love when he says this )

Rosecolouredspecs
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
In reply to: mnmoon70
Wed, 05-14-2008 - 1:49pm

...of course that is a lot easier for those who are properly equipped!


HAHAHA!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-21-2006
In reply to: mnmoon70
Wed, 05-14-2008 - 6:59pm

I'm late to this discussion and sorry to hear your friends were not more supportive. Funny, I had book club this Mon and when I mentioned I had finally finished D4's flower girl dress they all perked up and wondered if I was the one getting married! I haven't been to this group since Jan due to a class schedule conflict so they had forgotten my niece is getting married. But there was one time when my friend LW in this group said she didn't understand how people can be married for years and then a year or so after the divorce are already involved with someone else. I asked her if she expected me to join a convent. It was a surprising comment coming from her because she normally is pretty liberal in her opinions. This group of women are normally very supportive, one of them set me up on my first post divorce date. Perhaps since you normally keep your private life to yourself it was just a surprise to them that things had moved along so far with you and SEV.
So what did you just finish reading? We did The Madonnas of Leningrad.

QueenBun

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
In reply to: mnmoon70
Wed, 05-14-2008 - 7:08pm

Maybe you can suggest that the book club can read A New Earth by Eckhart Tolle next... in it, he talks about people who build themselves up by pointing out to others how "wrong" they are (implying that their judgment is ultimately the best).


But I agree with what the others have already said... unless they are living your life, and have been through what you've been through, they won't understand why your choices fit what you and your kids (and SEV and his kids) need. And they haven't seen how GREAT it is for everyone involved!!! No one is getting hurt, no one is getting ignored, no one is being forced to blend... they only hear "they're moving in together" and immediately think/judge the worst, without knowing all the good stuff.


I guess I'm coming in late on this one though- because your cute little butt has already been supported up to heaven today! lol ;-)


~shrimpy

~shrimpy

"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.

~<

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
In reply to: mnmoon70
Wed, 05-14-2008 - 9:45pm

"Perhaps since you normally keep your private life to yourself it was just a surprise to them that things had moved along so far with you and SEV."

That is a good point. I also think married people are CLUELESS about dating in this day and age. I think of many of them - and they would be way behind us if they were thrown into the swamp as we are. OMG - they have never heard of booty calls, FWB, exclusivity, OLD or any of that stuff!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
In reply to: mnmoon70
Thu, 05-15-2008 - 9:49am

I asked her if she expected me to join a convent.


EXCELLENT reply!


Perhaps since you normally keep your private life to yourself it was just a surprise to them that things had moved along so far with you and SEV.


I really do, after our discussion here, and putting MY feelings aside, think you are right with this.

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
In reply to: mnmoon70
Thu, 05-15-2008 - 9:51am
Thanks, Shrimpy.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-04-2004
In reply to: mnmoon70
Thu, 05-15-2008 - 10:05am

The foundation work is going on day three... and the outside work is on hold because we started getting rain yesterday. So now the holes outside all have standing water in them! :-P


As dry-dry-dry as we've been lately... now that there is digging outside my house, it rains alot!!! What timing, huh?!? But they are still working on the inside part... and making good progress.


It was a bit odd last night though- I dreamt of seeing new cracks in my floor- and having it look like it was going to cave in under our feet! Bleah on that!!


Thanks for asking!


AND... I'm reading Memory Keeper's Daughter right now!!!! So far it's been really interesting, and it's wrapping itself around differently than I expected. Right now I'm at the part where the kids are 18 and Dr. Henry went back to his abandoned childhood home... and met the teen girl there. I'm not sure HOW they will wrap this story up at this point!


~shrimpy

~shrimpy

"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.

~<

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
In reply to: mnmoon70
Thu, 05-15-2008 - 10:17am

Oh man, Shrimps!