Not about dating about Baby Daddy
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Not about dating about Baby Daddy
| Mon, 10-09-2006 - 3:16pm |
I am just wondering if anyone else has to deal with the father of their child being with the woman that he cheated on you with that you absolutly hate and wish would fall of the face of the earth? And still tries to get you back but you don't want him but then he throws her in your face to make you feel bad, and well it works then you feel crappy and you don't know why b/c you are trying to move on with your life but you still love him. I know it sounds confusing but has anyone else ever been in this situation. You love someone but can't be with them because all they do and have ever done is hurt you? I don't talk to him and try to aviod him and I do go out on dates. I just was hoping that someday this wouldn't hurt and it still does. What can someone do? I think I have done everything, leaving him alone, not asnwering his calls, not going up to visit him when he begs me too. I just don't know why I am still hurting. If anyone has any advise that would be great, or if you have been through the same situation, let me know what you did. And by the way I am dating someone but I just do it because, not because I want the guy or anything, it just gives me something to do.

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Thanks for your response
I am happy that you are doing better. I do all the right things and I am still sad, but I guess if he just leaves me alone I will be fine, I really don't know. Good luck with your son and your masters degree. Thank you for your response.
Mom,
They say it takes about a year to get over someone to the point of where you can try again. 4 months has gone by and that is a good start.
I think one of the most difficult things about any relationship ending is dealing with the hurt of why it ended. I am now 6 years divorced and this is the first time I have felt okay with what happened. My exh hurt me in a lot of ways because he put his own mom and other things way ahead of our marriage. I can accept now that he did the best he could do and was capable of doing and I forgive him and see the good of what he did do and what we have - namely our son. I am over it.
But in the times leading up to this I would have good and bad days. Sometimes I would remember the pain from the marriage - or I would mourn the loss of the marriage.
I never had to deal with the cheating part. And I was the one who wanted the divorce because I deemed our marriage very unhealthy for me. But it was still hard. I cannot imagine your pain of all you had to go through.
The only thing I can say is that somehow in time you will come to see the purpose of all that happened and you will see how it brings you good somehow. Maybe it is because you will meet someone so much better. Or you will see he does this again and again and thank goodness you don't have to put up with it? I am not sure.
Just have patience and keep doing what you are doing. One day it will just get better.
In the mean time, if you are not into the one you are with you should not hope for that to change and lead the person on - you should let him know the truth. That frees both of you up to move on with your lives.
I do hope you keep posting - we all really care and you have received such nice comments and posts so far from this board. We all want updates and to know how you are doing!! And everyone here would appreciate your input and opinion in their posts, too. That is what we are all about - supporting each other as single moms and encouraging everyone to find love again.
Thank You-
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