Not feeling good about this...
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| Wed, 09-22-2004 - 12:30pm |
Shane has been talking to him about moving out here to work for him at the dealership. He says it will help his friend learn to make some money and get some quality of life. I think it's great that he wants the best for his friend, but does he have to come here to do it? Shane thought he had him convinced to do it once before and he backed out. But Shane called this morning and said he thinks he has him talked into it now. Shane seems very excited about it. But I'mnot so much. I love him to death and he's a good guy, but the point is he will have to stay with us for a little while, which limits me to being fully dressed walking around the house at night instead of changing into my pj's early like I do sometimes, and we can't really be ourselves. I also feel like I'll spend a lot of time alone because Shane will be occupied with his friend talking to him and leaving me out of the loop.
Maybe this is selfish. But I'm not thrilled with the idea of his friend living with us even for a few days. It's just uncomfortable for me. When Shane called me to tell me about it, he could see I was less than excited and he wondered why. But he said he knew I'd be upset and he was sorry. We are not doing so well with money these last couple of months since traffic at the dealership has been down some and I don't think one more mouth to feed is a good idea even for a week. Plus the cost of going out that I'm sure Shane will add to the mix if his friend moves out here. I'm sure his friend will convince him to go out more than we can afford.
I know he's excited about his best friend coming out and i am happy for him. I know he likes hanging out with him. I'm just dreading the time alone I'll have if he comes. I'm used to having Shane here with me and including me when he does most things. It feels good to have someone that will do that. But if his friend comes, things will change. I know it.
Mel

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There is no way I would want a stranger in my house for more than a weekend. You have to set a boundary on this - and there has to be a deadline - a house guest for a few days is okay but it can't be a blank check to go on and on.
It is nice that he wants to help his friend but not nice that he invites him to stay without discussing first and without you two having a plan. You have to be in joint agreement with this.
I think it is a guy thing - Shane is so nice - and he just wanted to be nice and helpful to his friend. He didn't think about the repercussions.
He is a doll - from everything you say - just needs a few helpful tips along the way.
Shane's friend is coming tomorrow to interview. BUT...Shane cannot interview him or have him working directly under him. It would be like hiring family. Bad idea. So since Shane is over pre-owned cars, his friend will have to work for the new car area and there are two other managers that will interview him. SO it isn't set in stone that he's got the job. If he's not car business material, the guys will catch that and not offer him the chance. And Shane can't do a thing about it. He gave them a head's up about his friend, however, the dignity of the business is #1 priority and it doesn't matter who's friends with whom. If he's not right for it, he goes home and keeps doing what he's doing. So we'll see...
Mel
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Hi Mel, I just read through this whole thing.
IMO, his friend is just not the car guy type. It takes a certaint ype of person to fill those shoes. He just seems to be a totally different type. But he might surprise me. Car people are very ambitious go get 'em people. And they have to be. TO work strictly on commission, you have to be agressive. Shane's friend isn't like that. Or at least I have seen a much less than agressive demeanor in him. Shane wants to teach him to be a car person, but if he's not doing the interviewing, then he has no choice in the matter. It's all in his friend's hands and the person doing the interview.
I'll ask Shane later. I'm thinking the decision will take a few days. But who knows what will happen? I intend to stick to a week and no longer on the house guest deal. I love his friend to death, but he's used to taking part in the "Shane's free ride program" so he COULD potentially try to take advantage.
Mel
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