Ordering for you

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2008
Ordering for you
15
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 1:45am

I like it when Ducks Fan orders for me but when we were getting coffee the other day the lady kept looking at me to confirm every little step. It was kind of ridiculous especially since the only difference between his and mine was the amount of espresso shots. (Yes two shots- five for him- nonfat mocha, no whip cream, with a straw.) She also gave him a super dirty look when he saw that she was not making mine nonfat and reminded her that it needed to be (just like his was.) I am allergic to milkfat so her mistake would have made me sick but it was more like she was thinking he was watching my waistline.

But it got me thinking that I am a little old fashioned. Duck Fan always asks me what I am getting and orders for me which I happen to like (he's the only man who has ever done that.) Just like I like it when he holds the door for me and guides me with his hand on the small of my back. Just like I like it when he stands up when I do and gives me his jacket when I am cold. These are not odd things just respectful right?

So am I alone in this or are these things impressive on dates these days?

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Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 2:10am

I offer my jacket and open doors but don't presume to order for my date. I view that as something that she can do for herself, an empowerment thing. I want my DD15 to take charge for her own decisions as well.

I see the jacket and door thing as a non-gender specific thing for I would offer my jacket to those who are cold, either male or female. However, with that said, I am sensitive to the male ego thing as well. I have offered my DS19 my jacket. If I'm going through the door first then I would hold it for those behind me.

Mark





We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese Proverb







iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 7:13am

I think the waitress was way out of line with the looks. Its not up to her to decide what you drink.

As far as the gentlemenly stuff goes, I am so far removed from it that I would be shocked if I ever saw any of it again and wouldnt know what to do if a guy did that for me. Some of that stuff went out the window ages ago. Too bad too. Guys should still be gentlemen.

Laurie

anonymous
Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 10:25am
I only date men with good manners. I also love when a man orders for me. I am very much like you. I love old school, superb manners and to treat me like a lady. Love my flowers, my chocolates, being wine'd and dined, doors open for me, coats being put on for me and knowing the right thing to do at the right time. It's important for me. I don't see that as empowerment, I see that as being treated special. In return, I too treat that person special in my own way, by doing things I know he enjoys. I see it as a give and take. A sign of appreciation and respect for the individual.
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 10:50am

Kudos to DF for being a gentleman!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2008
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 12:06pm

Not Odd at all.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-28-2008
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 12:33pm

pacificsun2-1.jpg picture by samsigs
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 12:57pm

I just thought of something...


SEV doesn't usually order for me, unless you count the drive through at McDonalds... :-)

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 3:11pm

Jen, I'm the same way- I love to tell my date what I'd like to order and have him tell the waitress.


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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2008
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 8:52pm
Oh he asks me first except on the coffee thing because I have the same coffee every morning and so does he and I am somewhat a creature of habit LOL. Any restaurant though he'll ask me what I'd like and order it for me.
The door thing is definitely not gender specific and I know he holds the door for anyone but I am the only one who gets the hand on the back afterwards LOL!
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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-28-2008
Thu, 10-30-2008 - 8:55pm

She's not the regular girl. That one greets us by name and doesn't have to ask our order LOL! She also compliments me every time I see her so I like her a lot.

I am so excited by gentlemanly behavior because my ex hubby gave up on it long before I left him. He also decided he was against any PDA to the point I was lucky if he'd hold my hand in public.

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