QOTW: why do you want a relationship?
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QOTW: why do you want a relationship?
| Thu, 08-30-2007 - 9:27am |
I don't know if we have ever discussed this - and I am curious as to what everyone says.
What is the purpose of a boyfriend, significant other, husband in your life (or Mark and the other guys - a girlfriend or wife) in your life? Why do you want a relationship. What should the other person do for you?

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Great qn. I havent really thought about it.
But now that I am thinking-
I feel much happier being with some one whom I can trust and care for and who returns the same- as opposed to living alone. I am a kind of person that likes to share - good and bad.
Being alone makes me think unnecsessary things- makes myself more dull, I really like to have company.
I would like to have kids and have a dad figure for them of course and share the joys of rasing a family with him.
I feel stronger and happier and a better person - more confident-more productive- when I know Iam being loved and when I have some one to love.
and of course.. my guy doent spare a minute to do dishes if my sink is full, so I miss him when my sink is full and he is not around. :-) plus he is always happy to drive me anywhere ( sometimes I just hate driving) lol..this is true but just kidding - this cant be the reason why I like him!!.
Great question!!!!
In a solid relationship I am hoping to find comfort and companionship. I want to have someone in my life who encourages me to be the best person that I can be. Who recognizes all the little wonderful things I do to try and make life more fun and enjoyable for my children and of course for my partner as well.
I want to be appreciated and respected and, most imporatantly, loved for who I am and what I stand for and for the way in which I stand for it - whatever "it" may be. I want to be happy and, in a well balanced relationship, I know I will find that precious "holy grail".
There is a certain kind of "peace" I feel knowing that someone 'has my back' -
Looking forward to reading the other's opinions on this as well.
Rose
There is a certain kind of "peace" I feel knowing that someone 'has my back' - That is exactly the phrase I tend to use to describe what I want.
I also want my partner to be not afraid to tell me that I'm full of b.s. if he thinks I am.
I want to be in a relationship where we are not only having fun, but are regularly learning from one another.
And since no one else has said it yet I'm going to - I want to have regular, safe sex with someone I have strong feelings for.
The problem I'm having now is that I already have those things above - but something still seems to be missing and I'm not quite sure what it is.
I just hope for the day where I am in a relationship where the guy will take care of me and my son 100%. And I will gladly do the same for him. I feel like I have so much to give and when I am in a relationship that's what I like to do. And he would do the same for me.
He would be with me because he likes me for me and isn't just with me because he couldn't find "someone else". He would like giving me a back message when my back starts acting up(I have a bad back). He would spend time getting to know my son rather than just looking at him like... what is this? He would want to just have lazy nights and cuddle up and watch a movie and eat popcorn.
I love loving and being loved. When I am in a relationship it brings out a whole new side of me. I have more energy and I get more excited about the lamest stuff haha.
But the biggest problem is trust! Trust trust trust. I want a truthful relationship. Not someone who goes behind my back then lies straight to my face the next day. I am not going to lie, it takes a lot for me to trust someone just because I have been hurt so many times in the past. But I can tell when you mean it.
I just want to be myself again and have someone to share my life with.
Edited 8/30/2007 12:39 pm ET by lettersbad
I want a relationship because I want someone I can count on being there with/for. The friends I have are not people who I can call up and make plans to do things with and to share my life with. I can do that with them occassionally but not as a given.
All my past romantic relationships were with women I can check in with on a daily basis, see in person on a regular basis, and share what is going on with me inside and have her listen and care. All of that nurtures me. And oh yes, the physical and sexual intimacy that goes with it as well.
This is not to say we each have our own lives with work, friends, family, and other interests but I know that I can count on her if needed.
It's all about intimacy for me, i.e. spiritual, emotional, physical, sexual.
Mark
I'm not so sure that I want a major relationship.
Great question. I want companionship, partnership, and sex. Honestly just someone to share things with that I enjoy (and to fix the toilet when it breaks LOL).
This is a hard thing to articulate really. I have been married twice now so you think that I would just give up. I just want someone to snuggle with and watch a movie, enjoy a laugh, dance at a wedding, watch the kids open their presents on Christmas, clean-up after dinner, cry to when I had a bad day, rejoice with when I had a good day, just someone to share my life with. As corny as that sounds, that is what I want. He doesn't need to be rich, or the best looking, but intelligent, funny, nice, sincere, and good with kids.
Does all that make sense?
Priscilla
What I want for now might not be what I want in the future, but for right now, I'm not looking for anything too serious.
I want commitment (dating exclusively, and not looking for anyone else). I want companionship (a good friendship base) and someone I can do things with. As an activities partner for movies, concerts, plays, dinners out- just because these things are more fun than going alone.
I want sex with my partner. If it wasn't for the sex/romance part, I might as well find a female activities partner for the social events, right? So yes, having Hiker around is partly for the sex (although it's not ONLY for that).
I want someone I can share my thoughts and stories with. Though I do have plenty of friends (both IRL and online) who will hear my thoughts and stories all day anyway- so Hiker is not my only outlet for that. But it's nice that the man I'm dating is available and okay with hearing my ramblings.
What I am NOT looking for with a relationship:
Not looking for someone to support me financially.
Not looking for someone to hurry up and marry, for having more children.
Not looking for a Dad for my kids (a good decent role model is a requirement though- won't date a "bad boy" who might be a bad influence).
Not looking for someone to share a household with.
Not looking for a 24/7 attached-at-the-hip kind of relationship.
So for now, Hiker is just right. :-)
~shrimpy
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<
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