Remember my inappropriate crush?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Remember my inappropriate crush?
5
Wed, 06-27-2007 - 10:25pm

Well, it got a little weird tonight. First, a disclaimer: My friends are pretty open talking about sex, joking around, and things like that. I don't have a problem with it either, except when it comes to real-time - i.e., if it's happening now or possibly in the future, I clam up. But if you get uncomfortable talking about it, you may want to stop reading here. So, here's some interesting tidbits:

1) Sunday morning, sitting around after getting up from camping with my friends, my crush, E, said that he'd like to touch my breasts - in front of my son! There was a little more to it and it was totally general, but still... It was brought up again tonight and another friend said he'd probably like to touch any woman's breasts, which I'd agree with.
BTW, DS didn't particularly like him talking about his mom, but he's pretty used to having sex discussed around him. As I said, I'm open about it.

2) Sunday morning while cleaning up, he flicked water on me, I said he got me wet, and his response was, "So I make you wet?" The only thing I could think of to say was "Every time".

3) Tonight, we had a class together. He sat beside me (I made sure I sat down first). He drew on my Chick-fil-A cup, drew a line on my arm, and at one point our arms and knees were touching. Okay, so I'll take anything I can get!!!

4) There was discussion about him not making a play on me because of ex-bf, but his sister said they're not really friends, so it was okay. There was also discussion about him not being with his sister's friends, but she said he could be with anyone he wanted to.

5)Somehow we got on the topic of biting and I said that I like to be bitten on my back and my breasts. Of course, we had established Saturday (through discussion only) that he likes it rough, so it was only a fair trade of info, right?

6) The fact that my b-day is coming up, and it was suggested that he give me sex for my b-day. It got intense enough that I was blushing (not something I do often) and finally left because I just didn't know how to react.

It was almost surreal. I still don't feel like I can admit that I have a crush on him. I'm not sure if he feels the same way about me, or if he's just joking around. And if he does, if it's just sex, I'm not interested - I just can't do casual sex with friends.

I'll see him again tomorrow night - I'm exercising with him and his sister, and then we're watching a movie - so, we'll see how it goes.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-27-2007
Wed, 06-27-2007 - 11:59pm

Wow.

If you just want to hook up with this guy, have fun, whatever...then go with it.

The fact that he made sexual innuendo to you in front of your SON? Hopefully, you are only looking for a casual hook up with a guy like this. He obviously, (hopefully) has no kids!

 


 

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 6:17am
It sounds like he wants someone to "hook up" with. Does he ever talk to you about anything other than sex? I know you mentioned if he just wants sex then you're not ok with that. I'd be very careful if you want more than a friends with benefits. It seems like that's what he's after.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 7:21am
Actually, my son is used to hearing sexual innuendo/sexual type humor. He's 14 and I'm trying to teach him that sex is a natural thing and not something to be embarrassed about. I know not everyone agrees with me, but hopefully, he'll feel comfortable enough to talk to me (or another adult) about it BEFORE he goes out and gets some girl pregnant (we also talk about safe sex). So, his saying it front of my son was only amusing and not a deal-breaker (besides, I started it).
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2003
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 7:26am
He gives the impression that that he's only after a casual hook-up, but he also jokes constantly, like as a cover-up for everything else. Not that he can't have serious conversations, and yes, we do talk about things other than sex. He's just not serious very often. Before anything were to happen between us, I'd make it very clear that I'm not interested in friends with benefits.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Thu, 06-28-2007 - 8:38am

When a guy has romantic interests he is more shy and interested in you. When he is interested in a hook up he talks about sex.

I have had crushes so I know all to well how they make you feel flustered and have strong feelings. Sometimes to your detriment to the point that you only see what you want to see.

But you are the one who has to determine what you want. I know you like him. Hopefully this is all just his nerves and he will be interested in you.

Good luck and keep us posted!!