Right time, the right place...
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| Tue, 04-17-2007 - 9:26am |
right body, the right face, timber I'm falling in love. It started slow, it's coming fast, I got a feeling it's gonna last, timber I'm falling in love. You're so pretty, look so sweet, your love's sweepin' me off of my feet, you're the only one I'm dreamin of, I can't believe that I'm falling in love....
Wow. So, our trip was great. The kids had a blast, I got tan (yay!!) and we just enjoyed ourselves. The weather was great, especially when we heard that everyone back home was getting inches and inches of snow! Seemed a little surreal- we were swimming, it was 90, and at home they were shoveling!
We did a bunch of stuff, I'm totally exhausted- Disney for 6 days with two little kids (I will never do that again!) wore me out! We're all taking an extra day off today to regroup, recoup, and get some basic stuff done here.
ok, so yadda yadda yadda, trip good, safe travel, home now.
Here's the scary, exciting, sparkly, troublesome, happy update.
I am now sure I'm falling for funnyguy. I've had lots of experiences as a single mom where I'd have this vague sense of dissatisfaction when doing some type of "family" thing. Like we'd be at an amusement park and I'd wish we were a foursome instead of a twosome. Or we'd be at dinner, and I'd wish we were requesting a table for four instead of three. But the fourth person was always a vague, nameless, faceless man. Even when I was dating someone, he wasn't necessarily the person I wished was there. Until funnyguy.
I did have fun on our trip, but I missed him. Not the idea of him, but him specifically. There were definite moments when I wished he was there- the kids would get antsy waiting in line, and I'd think how he'd entertain us and make us all laugh.
At first, this whole thing with him scared me- in a good way. I was worried that I'd become attached, that the kids would, and then he'd leave, as men are wont to do when I like them. Now, however, I'm too happy being with him to worry about when he leaves. The fact is, I don't think he will.
He met my family on Easter, and that went well. I'm probably meeting his this weekend, which makes me nervous, but not too nervous. He's met my friends, we're planning for me to meet his. He's invited me on a trip to FL in August for his cousin's wedding, and I'm thinking I'd really like to go.
It is so easy to be with this man. I don't have to wonder or worry or think about any of it. It just feels right. Last night he came over, and we simply cuddled and talked and even though he stayed the night, we didn't feel the need to have sex. It was probably one of the best nights of my life- and we didn't even do anything. He got my woodstove going while I threw in a load of laundry, and for me to be bale to let him do that was simply amazing for me. I've never been the type to relinquish control in any way over my life.
I know that it's probably too soon to really know if I actually love him, but I'm definitely falling for him. From all accounts, he feels the same way, though neither of us is feeling pressured to say anything to the other about it. I'm enjoying this feeling, and also enjoying knowing there's no pressure with him. I don't have to be someone I'm not, and I don't have to wonder if he's just behaving the way he thinks I want him to.
We're friends, we're lovers, and at some point in the future, I can see us being so much more than that to each other. I'm letting him in and accepting his help without losing myself or my own independence. He's sharing his life with me without giving up his own interests, and we do enjoy each other so much.
This is what a good relationship feels like, and I'm so happy I can recognize it, appreciate it, and value it for what it is.
Moody, settled and sparkly, happy and hopeful

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I'm so happy for you, Moody!!! I'm glad your trip went well, but also that things with Funnyguy is working out so well, too. :-) :-) :-)
I've never known if I could explain the thoughts and feelings I have with Hiker and what you wrote described alot of what I have going, too. Only ours is a bit more settled now because it isn't 'new' anymore... but it is also a bit overwhelming and exciting and scary and thrilling at times, but yet it's still safe and comforting and real and secure and happy. All rolled into one.
I couldn't be happier for you, Moody!!! I hope this turns out to be The One for you because you deserve to have someone great and feel this great forever!
~shrimpy
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<
My ex husband and I split about 6 years ago. Actually, officially it'll be six years on November first. We had one split the November before that, when I was pregnant with my daughter, and got back together after counseling and parenting and anger management classes on his part, but he was not willing to change and I knew I could not be with someone who placed himself above all others, and at the expense of all others.
I very casually tested the dating waters a few months later, but I was not even sure who I was- I definitely wasn't ready to figure out who I wanted. I was 20 when we split, and simply didn't know myself well enough at the time to know what I wanted. I'm glad I knew myself well enough to figure out before any serious damage was done that I didn't want my ex-husband.
After about a year of being single, I met a neighbor who moved in with us way too quickly. That relationship was all about me being afraid of being alone, not wanting to end up alone, and settling for the first man I met who showed any signs of interest in me. We were totally incompatible, in every way. There were so many red flags in that relationship I could have blanketed the state of Texas with 'em! it's hard to believe now that I ever dated himI ended that relationship about two years ago, and took a few months to just figure me out all over again.
I'm so glad I went through what I have and finally found myself, figured out who I am and how to make myself happy.
I started doing OLD about a year and a half ago, and did it off and on (mostly on, but with few results) for that time. I met a lot of people in the last 6-8 months, but nothing really clicked until now. I did meet a couple of interests through work, and a couple more through my hobbies, but OLD was the easiest way for me to go given my busy life.
I wouldn't trade my experiences for anything, but I was literally at the point where I was ready to give up on OLD for a while- in fact, I had logged in to Match to cancel it when funnyguy's first email to me was there. I read it, then his profile, and realized I absolutely had to email him back.
From there, things have gone amazingly well, and needless to say I have cancelled my subscription.
Moody, a reformed dating disaster
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Well i think about what I am to do now. This last 3 weeks was a disaster, so I have to start fresh again. I could call up my part-timer(FWB),, he would meet me in a second, but the reason I stopped seeing him in the first place is because I wanted more.
So instead of going backwards I should take this time to move forward, and step out of the same pattern I seem to fall into. So I guess this is alone time for me for a while. I would like the next guy I sleep with to be a new guy, not the same man in different packaging,, and I have learned you can get to someone pretty well without sleeping with them.
I'm going to be moving when school lets out, not far, but I will have my own place again finally, and i will own it.Its nothing great, but in a few years I will be able to sell it and have a nice downpayment for a real house of my own.The last 2 men I have dated are so far away, I always traveled to them, and would like to meet a local guy who would come to me for a change..
This is my area, my home town, and I'm guess I finally have realized that I like it here..
Oh well I'm just trying to not feel rejection, even though my head says he was bad news and to get out quick,,,
Moody, glad you had a great trip.
You are not a dating disaster, quite the contrary. You've had some disaster dates, we all do, part of the whole experience. I think the key is that you learned from the disaster dates, kept putting yourself out there while enjoying your single life too. I really believe there are multiple people out there who are potential great matches for a life together, just got to be patient and enjoy the experience of finding them.
I remember that phase of letting go, allowing myself to be taken care of even in small ways. Like Shrimpy and Hiker, M and I are a bit more settled. I hope you too get to that settled yet still separate phase. It's all I personally can handle right now with everything else in my life.
This sounds amazing! I'm so happy for you! You're so balanced in how you think and let me tell ya...the good stories give me some hope!
Happy, Happy, Happy!
~ Caryn
Wow - I can't believe you are back from your trip already. It seems that it was just yesterday and you were packing!
It sounds like you and funnyguy are doing well. I like a lot of what you write - that you are the same, he likes your kids - how great that he is into them as well as you - that he is talking about the future and you sound quite happy. It is great that he is into meeting your parents and friends and introducing his. Maybe we should all try to check out the country guys better in our area? This one sounds genuine.
My only caution is to just keep the brakes on the throttle a little bit so to speak. Just to make sure you are getting what you want and what you think you see. And to just keep enjoying what you have.
You sound so happy!! And that is what we all like to hear.
First of all, so glad that your vacation with the kiddos was "magical"! Sounds like you had a blast!
I am so excited for you and this new guy. I continue to plod along with the whole Match.com phenomenon. Hey, ya never know!!!!!
~Dani~
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