She has 2 kids & STILL goes for bad boys

iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
She has 2 kids & STILL goes for bad boys
12
Sun, 12-24-2006 - 7:23pm

I work retail at a clothing brand store. My manager is 39 and has 2 children, but somehow manages to look remarkably beautiful and stunning. The thing that annoys me though is that she STILL goes for bad boys. In her line of work, she gets hit on a lot, which she admits she likes, but I see her and she only responds possitively to players and bad boys; guys who're really handsome, guys who come into the store with 2 or 3 girls with them, guys who come in with a cocky attitude. And she goes out with these guys.

We've gotten to know eachother through work the past few months. I really like her, and attempted to ask her out on more than 1 occassion, which she kindly declined. But it infuriates she makes these decisions about her dating life. She's been cheated on and lied to by her past several boyfriends. Shouldn't she see a pattern by now? She's pushing 40 and has 2 children. Shouldn't she be past the point in her life where she's judging men by how smooth, popular and handsome they are? Shouldn't she be looking for someone who could be a father to her kids?

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iVillage Member
Registered: 12-07-2006
Fri, 01-05-2007 - 12:01am

"Wow, 20 years old! There are tons and tons of girls that are your age. Look at your peers. If you're focusing on an older woman (who is an authority figure), I'd say that you're trying to avoid growing up and you actually fear responsibility. If this woman was with you, she'd be a safety net for you...like a mom figure. She is old enough to be your mom."

I like her because she's sweet and funny and gorgeous. My friends and some of my coworkers sometimes joke about her being a MILF, but frankly it disgusts me because she is not only just hot. She is legitimately drop-dead beautiful. Plus we've shared a lot with eachother and have a lot in common.

It just hurts me to see her do this to herself. When the first 1 or 2 men cheated on her or lied to her only to sleep with her, it was their fault, but 8 men have done this to her since her divorce. She's willingly ignorant of this because she wants a handsome face and a smooth talker instead of an honest and loyal personality.

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
Fri, 01-05-2007 - 9:37am

There are beautiful 20-yr-old girls who do not have the character flaw of constantly picking the wrong men. If what you say is true about the 39-yr-old mom, then she has personality issues if she is ONLY attracted to smooth talkers, very handsome men, etc...
If her character is so shallow, she is not beautiful. Find someone with a good heart.

Also, realize that your age difference is a big deal. I know some 20-somethings who are about 10 years younger than me. They think they are talking to me as a peer, but I've been there done that. I see their inexperience in everything they say and do. They amuse me because they are full of energy and entertaining, but I feel more companionship with people closer to my own age or older.

For many women (and this is especially true after we hit age 30), the number one thing we look for in a mate is job stability. If a woman has a career, she wants a man who has an equivalent career or better.

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