Single Mom/Finance Question

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Single Mom/Finance Question
9
Fri, 06-03-2005 - 10:11am

hey girls... this isn't really "dating" related, but figured that you all could help me sort some stuff out. I am newly single, divorcing after a 10 year marriage, with two little girls, ages 8 and 2. We are living mwith my parents right now, and I just went back to work 2 weeks ago, after being a SAHM forever. I'm looking forward to finding my own place and getting out of my parent's house... but have no idea of how much of my take home salary should be rent. I've always owned a home with my husband, and we never had a really "tight" living expense budget. I know that the cost of living is different in different parts of the country, so telling me your take home pay and rent won't help... but about what percentage of your weekly/montly pay goes towards your rent? I don't even know where to start looking budget-wise for an apartment/condo.

Thanks for any advice from you BTDT's....

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Fri, 06-03-2005 - 11:38am

Sorry to hear you are newly divorced after being a SAHM - that is quite a shock to have to be on your own and to have to live with your parents. But hopefully they are supportive and you are through the worst and good things will come to you soon. I hope you and your parents can try to see that this could be a good time for quality time together and that they will help you.

As far as finances, I believe that you should try to get your own house - you get equity and can write off the interest - much better than throwing away rent money - but of course you have to afford it - I hope you can stick it out as long as you can at your parents - that is what I would do, especially if they would babysit - that is expensive!!

Anyway, I spend about 35% of my income on my mortgage/insurance/property taxes. But I think it is more important to look at the whole picture rather than the percentage - what are your expenses for a car, car/health insurance, gas, groceries, utilities, clothing, education, entertainment, debt? And how much do you have left over for rent/mortgage?

I have always believed in keeping the expenses as low as possible and investing in the biggest house possible. You can really cut back on disposable spending when you have to. But at the same time, you don't want to get in a jam when an emergency strikes.

When I first struck out on my own, I made an excel spread sheet with all of the current expenses we had. And I cut out everything we could do without - making some deep cuts - no eating out, minimal groceries for from-scratch foods, no housekeeper/babysitter, no newspaper, no dog, cheap haircuts, no clothes (bought and sold for DS on ebay), lower electric, smaller car. I worked at being able to stay in my house and did it. And then I worked on paying off some of my debt - I am still working on that now. It is amazing at what you can do when you have to do it!! And as you get out there working you can increase your income.

I hope this helps - I am sure the others will have good tips, too.

signature
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-04-2005
Fri, 06-03-2005 - 12:35pm

Judy,

It wasn't my question but I still needed that advice. I wrote down some of what you said since I'm in the same situation as tupper as far as looking to venture out on my own.

Thanks again

Amy

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Fri, 06-03-2005 - 1:10pm

I am glad I could help. I just know that when I took over the financial reins for myself after our separation it was scary. I had spent the last part of our 10 year marriage giving up my career to stay home with DS and launching a business. We had some really lean times and I will never forget those days - but they did teach me a lot. They gave me the balls to go out on my own!!

It was scary because I had to learn accounting and a lot of stuff really fast. And I had to hold it together through 9/11 and in the years afterwards.

The book, The Millionaire Mind (and also The Millionaire Next Door) taught me so so much about attitude with finances. I highly recommend them for all. It teaches you the value of accumulation versus spending. Even though I am more comfortable now I never waste money - I still cook from scratch - even birthday cakes - and do as much as I can myself and even hang the clothes after 5 minutes in the dryer.

I will never forget to be frugal - because you never know when you will need that skill again.

signature
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Fri, 06-03-2005 - 10:52pm

I spend about 24% of my take home pay on rent. I am saving for a down payment on a house now, but where I live a mortgage + property taxes + insurance + interest + maintenance for a decent townhome would be almost twice what I pay in rent, and I can't afford the monthly increase until dd starts going to public school.

Here is a link to a template of my budget spreadsheet on the budgeting board (actual bills and amounts have been changed to protect the innocent, lol): http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-mljournal&msg=1861.9 There are other spreadsheets in the thread, it might be helpful to check them out.

This is a good thread started by a single mom on the budgeting board, it might be helpful to you as well: http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-mljournal&msg=2161.1&ctx=128

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
Sun, 06-05-2005 - 2:34pm

Contact an apartment building in your area where you would consider renting. Ask them what their income to rent requirement is. Each apartment building has their own standard. Use this as your guide.

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Tue, 06-07-2005 - 3:30am
I have no idea either. However, I have decided to pay more rent then anything else. I want my girls to live in a nice enviroment and therefore it's important to me that I put more money into my apartment or one day house, then I do for anything else. I don't have a job yet, so I don't know how much is going to feed into my rent, but I hope it won't be more then 35% with utilities.
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-11-2004
Wed, 06-08-2005 - 10:50pm

35% of gross income is what the mortgage lenders use as their guideline for the

Stephanie, CL of the Dating as a Single Parent board: http://messageboards.ivillage.com/iv-p

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-02-2003
Thu, 06-09-2005 - 1:39pm

"Remember that if you buy a house, the mortgage interest is tax-deductible, which cuts your true cost of paying for housing. So, you can really afford to pay more for a mortgage than you can for rent. Plus, you get appreciation on your property (here in California the market is just going insane, and I see my equity jump every month)."

That is so true! Since I bought my house, I can claim 6 exemptions on my taxes, and still get over $1000 back every year. And my equity has gone up $60K in just 1.5 years. It's insane. (I live in the Seattle, WA area)...real estate is booming here as well.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-28-2005
Thu, 06-09-2005 - 2:34pm

My monthly take home is 1900.00 and my rent for a 2 bedroom 2 bath in Las Vegas, NV is $750.00 hope that helps.

Becky