So why does it hurt? Dang it

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
So why does it hurt? Dang it
6
Sun, 06-22-2008 - 3:59pm
I know cutting things off with GPS was the right thing to do, mentally but man I feel so bad this afternoon.
 
iVillage Member
Registered: 09-25-2004
Sun, 06-22-2008 - 8:24pm

I read you other post. This guy GPS is a big NEXT candidate.. sheesh so immature.


I do chat up with people at times even cashiers and people we meet and I have seen how Biker smiles even seconds later about how I chat . He just enjoys whatever I says even if it is to someone else. I ask him why are you smiling and he says something like "just thinking how sweet it is when you chat and I bet that guy is gonna dream about you.." lol. I have never seen a tig of jealousy.


Back to GPS I think you should be happy you got rid of him.. He knows you are really great and that is why he gets jealous knowing how immature and incapable he is.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2006
Sun, 06-22-2008 - 9:27pm
I dated someone who was jealous and passive aggressive like this guy. It took me too long to next him because I kept thinking "he must have been joking....he doesnt really think that way" but HE DID and it all acme out after too long. I was flirting with the midas muffler guy, the costco cashier, a gay co worker who might not be gay after all....you name it.....ridiculous. I remember one guy I dated before him who didnt mind it at all and I think he had the same reaction as dancewithme's guy because he was amused by it and said one day " you are so great - you kinda flirt with the world"
Dont worry - relief will set in soon enough. This guy was a definite NEXT
Lilypie - Personal picture
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Mon, 06-23-2008 - 8:04am

I think from all you have written that no matter what you said to him - that was not going to change that he is simply not a match for you. And I think the frustration from that is what led you to let go - but yes maybe a lesson for next time on how to ask for a change in a positive manner.

I think it is always said when something doesn't work out and then you realize that you have to start over to find someone, which is never easy. But we will get more stories so that is good for here, right? LOL!!

I really think you made a good decision with this one. NEXT!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Mon, 06-23-2008 - 10:33am

Hey you.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2007
Mon, 06-23-2008 - 11:57am

Hey girl-


I know how you are feeling. It's so easy when you are on this side seeing in..we can all say "good job" for leaving and stuff..and you DID do a good job at that... But there is more to this and I'm sensing that. Probably because I live the "more to it" everyday and so I know. The thing is that you hit upon something really valuable as far as self insight. You noticed that you tend to block yourself off and end things abruptly without first clarifying the issues and fully communicating. And even if GPSdude is just the wrong guy for you, it still warrants a look inside as to how you respond to relationship trouble. I support you 100 percent on that because I am always learning about that.


The thing IMO that puts closure and ease into making a decision is to know that you communicated and expressed yourself authentically to someone- you were heard fir who you are and your true needs as a person in a relationship. If you do that (even as scary and vulnerable feeling as it is) at least you go away knowing you were true to your needs. God have I been there...and I still am today. Its really hard sometimes to not hide behind the tough ass exterior. I wish I could just harden up sometimes and not show weakness because I mistakenly think that will protect me...but then I realize that only shells me off and I never get my true self across to anyone.


I know things are history with GPSdude. But I see that you are sensing a desire to have more of yourself heard with him and maybe others. You could take the opportunity to write out your truest feelings ( I know, scary right?) and you never even have to send it. Just getting those things out is a huge first step towards beginning to express yourself and needs honestly.


Good luck and huge hugs. Just know I have truly been there...and I'm still learning :o)


~Pacific~



Edited 6/23/2008 11:58 am ET by pacific_sun
~Pacific~
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-25-2002
Mon, 06-23-2008 - 3:27pm

Sorry about the break up... and i know that even when it feels like the right thing to do.. it still hurts..


I recently saw an article about the best breakup movies to watch... so i put all of these in my blockbuster queue for me.... i'll pass this to you.


1) Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind: starring Jim Carey and Kate Winslet


2) Closer


3) The Break Up: with Jennifer Anniston


there were two more.... i'll post it once if remember....


Loonybunny