Still stumped

iVillage Member
Registered: 04-25-2005
Still stumped
4
Tue, 04-26-2005 - 1:19pm
How do I just run into him? I do not think we have any mutual ground besides his coworker and our families.Any suggestions?
iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
In reply to: jenniferk04
Tue, 04-26-2005 - 1:25pm
Do your families know each other well? If so, work it that way. Have your family members help you. What you need is a reason to be where he is.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-26-2003
In reply to: jenniferk04
Tue, 04-26-2005 - 2:14pm


Ok, just a word of caution from one who's been there, done that. You're spending way too much effort and anxiety over this already.

If you do want to drop a note, etc. be prepared for him to think you're anything from "a little nuts" to "a stalker". Those are worst case scenarios. IF you want to take the traditional (I'm not saying right or wrong, just traditional)"man's" role and ask him out, then you just do it and be willing to accept rejection (the way men have for a long time) OR you forget it till you have a more "natural" opportunity.

If we were consulting the "he's just not that into you" school of thought...he would have asked when you were in contact IF he was very interested. If he didn't ask, he wasn't that interested.

Avatar for cl_beckty
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2003
In reply to: jenniferk04
Tue, 04-26-2005 - 2:35pm

Ok, just a word of caution from one who's been there, done that. You're spending way too much effort and anxiety over this already


This is VERY true.


If you run into him, great. You might have some chemistry. If not, then why not pay attention to some other men who are easily accessible? Why this one?

Becky

Becky

 

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-30-2003
In reply to: jenniferk04
Tue, 04-26-2005 - 3:16pm

Yes, I agree with the other posters. I think you are spending to much energy thinking about this one guy. Let him be a pleasant mental distraction, but don't go out of your way to get together with him.

When I was between boyfriends, I decided that I wanted a man to ask me out. I didn't want to ask him out or try to work an angle. My current boyfriend pursued the relationship with me. We had a great time during our first date, but I was prepared to walk away from it if he didn't ask me out for the second date.

He called me the next day to ask me out to dinner one night that week. If he had not contacted me, I would have let it drop. You kind of have to be like. In the beginning, don't expect much and let the man do most of the work.