Well, it sounds like the dad's house is at least okay - I mean they are not having wild parties there every night. I do think what you need right now is time - time for her to be away so she misses you. I am guessing here, but it seems like she has fed into the male ego of her father - I want to live with you because you are better than mom. BUT I think, as I said before, that things are going to go sour over there. Because it doesn't sound like he is setting boundaries and she is going to disrupt their house and get into the same trouble and then all of a sudden your exh will listen to you and hopefully things will go better - I just think he has to have the time to see what you see. Because teenager + no boundaries = disrupted house and disaster!! I also think QB is right - there is always time for her to get her act together and find her niche in life.
I think you should go to the counselor yourself so you can come up with a good set of rules for the exh and your DD to follow. I bet she will have some good advice for you.
I would say they stick to the schedule and you are not a dumping ground for now - but see what the counselor says.
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Thank you for your input.
Well, it sounds like the dad's house is at least okay - I mean they are not having wild parties there every night. I do think what you need right now is time - time for her to be away so she misses you. I am guessing here, but it seems like she has fed into the male ego of her father - I want to live with you because you are better than mom. BUT I think, as I said before, that things are going to go sour over there. Because it doesn't sound like he is setting boundaries and she is going to disrupt their house and get into the same trouble and then all of a sudden your exh will listen to you and hopefully things will go better - I just think he has to have the time to see what you see. Because teenager + no boundaries = disrupted house and disaster!! I also think QB is right - there is always time for her to get her act together and find her niche in life.
Good luck and keep us posted.
Thanks West.
Unfortunately it's the way it's got to be, but in truth I'm relieved.
I think you should go to the counselor yourself so you can come up with a good set of rules for the exh and your DD to follow. I bet she will have some good advice for you.
I would say they stick to the schedule and you are not a dumping ground for now - but see what the counselor says.
Of course he's going to play the "Holy-er than thou" card.
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