thinking hard today
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thinking hard today
| Thu, 09-09-2004 - 4:53pm |
Am I terrible? I heard an estimate of people being home from overseas in 4 years, that was Kerry's optimistic "if you elect me" estimate. That's optimistic?
I have really been thinking that over. I don't want to be without Trav for 4 years, or even only seeing him every 6 months. I don't want to be "on hold" for that long. I need to communicate that to him, I guess...
Feels pretty sad...I'm trying to convince myself I'm not being a quitter.

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I know trav isn't ready to make any more commitment than he already has, and we really just got started when he had to go, so it's totally understandable. I think maybe it's just time to call a hiatus.
I'm keeping on with my life, no matter what. And I will stay positive. It's just this needs to be resolved in my mind. I'd love nothing better than to have trav here as a companion, and I really thought that would have happened by now. I just need to decide where I am right now, and then let him know.
It wouldn't be hard at all if it weren't for two facts.
1) I know he wants me to wait, and he doesn't want me to look for someone else.
2) When I do see him, all the feelings are still there, strong and wonderful.
*sigh*...it couldn't just be EASY could it? Nah... LOL
I can see myself doing a "mags" (no offense intended there Maggie) and dating other guys and comparing them to trav and them all coming up short. And posting about the guy that "was the love of my life"...wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.... :)
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