Tine again for Wednesday Woes.......

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Tine again for Wednesday Woes.......
14
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 12:53pm

Ok, let everyone post the vent of the week. This can pertain to job, family, school, kids, whatever is woeing you.

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Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 1:07pm

MY WOE is that I can't WRITE today! LOL.

Ok, so let me think. It all boils down to money, but otherwise, this week is a little lighter on the worries. I'm not dating, so I don't have a date vent. I do have a X husband and X family vent, but I thought about it enough to say, it's not worth bringing on the board and it's just NOT worth thinking twice about it anymore. I don't know what this haircut has done for me, but I am developing this attitude of "I just don't care", but, I got myself a new outfit for under 7 dollars, I have a new haircut, I put makeup on everyday and I feel much more positive about myself. I KNOW what I want. I want to get more things in my life for me. I want to buy that house by myself. With no one to help me or do it with me. I want to accomplish some more things JUST for ME. Not only this board, but lately the books I read; for instance: Love Smarter helped in that category too. Not everything in the book of course and it really skims quickly through everything, but it hits certain things on the head and you have to take those things and reflect on them and KEEP going back to them. I think it really made me think about "Who the HECK am I trying to impress and WHY?" Why do I feel I am not worthy of this or that? Who CARES!!! It has been forever since this or that happened. I am beyond that, I've outgrown this or that. I made bad choices, but I Don't have to punish myself for those choices. I really love who I am, I know I am a great person, I have certain quirks, but their WILL be a man eventually who loves those quirks. The whole point is, I am just really picky and for awhile I started dating almost anyone. Almost anyone is over now; I am going to find the right one, but with no time limit. If I end up not dating for several months, WHO CARES, as long as I am happy and keep myself happy that is all that counts.
So the reality is: My biggest woe would be Jesus Sandals right now and I am putting a considerable amount of time into that thought process. I am unsure if I want to see him again this weekend. I don't want the pressure of him making moves on me that I am not ready for. I am just not ready and I don't know if it's even him. It's that I'm just not ready in general. I'm starting to enjoy being with myself.

So this wasn't a real woe, but woes from the last few weeks that are shaping into reflection of what I really want.
Happy Woeing everyone.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-05-2004
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 2:07pm

Well, mine is always about money but right now it is okay.

This isn't a woe as much as it is a concern. I got a copy of the court summons where I filed to amend to ask for more child support. I can only imagine what my ex did when he saw them. I hit him where it hurts the most -- his wallet. Sad but true. He was very protective with his money while we were married and he definitely didn't want to give me any alimony or child support. I didn't want alimony but I did need child support. It's been 4 years ago since it was ever figured up and I think it is time for it to be recalculated especially with Logan getting older and being in regular school. He is supposed to be paying for 50% of the child care (before and after school program) but he doesn't need it anymore since his new wife stays at home so he has not paid anything towards child care since June. Our agreement says that he is supposed to pay 50% and I am supposed to pay 50% regardless of who needs it. I even went to an attorney to make sure I was reading it correctly. Well, I'm sure things will be tense from now until Aug 31 when we are supposed to appear in court. He thinks I'm stupid and would never realize that I can change child support. lol My grandmother is going to pay for the lawyer fees which I am MOST greatful!!! If she wasn't, I would be going by myself to face my ex and his attorney and I don't want to do that. I am already intimidated! I don't know WHY I let him intimidate me! Ugh! Anyway...

Work is driving me crazy. My brain is STILL turning into mush. lol I have sent off 3 resumes so hopefully I will hear something this week or next.

I'm starting to gain back the 12 pounds I lost recently. I know it is nothing in the world but nerves. My stomach as been upset for the past 2-3 weeks. It has gotten better over the past 3 or 4 days though. This along with my hips/lower back pain make is even better! (Sarcasm there lol) I DO go to Charlottesville Monday to see if they can find out what in the world is wrong with my hips and hopefully they will do more than the drs here where I live have!

I do have one good thing to say though -- I have 3 1/2 weeks off from school from now until the fall semester starts! woohoo! :) I can finally get stuff done around the house that needs to be done and has been piling up! I have a lot of filing to do and little fix-it-up things that need to be done.

I think that is about it. :)

Jennifer

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 2:10pm

My only woe is sick kids. One started with the sniffles over the weekend. I thought it was allergies but must not be as another one woke up this morning with a low grade fever and his own sniffles. Now I have sniffles, GRRRRRRR! Everyone made it to school/work so so far so good. I really want everyone well right now. I don't need the stress of missing work etc with sick kids.

That is it for me. Sick kids can't be avoided but they need to get their timing better ;o)

Priscilla

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2007
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 2:19pm

my big woe is a set of huge decisions I need to make quickly.

I have a job offer but it means moving about an hour from where I am (otherwise the commute would be impossible). There is a great school I can get the kids into if we move. There is an apartment which isn't ideal but is very nice.

The woe is the stress from having just a few days to make the decision about whether to uproot us (for the second time this year) or to pass on this offer.

I know, I know, I'm lucky to have such a problem. I just don't know if we can all take more change right now but I also don't want to pass this up just because I'm scared. Of course everyone in my life has an opinion about what I should do and no two people have the same opinion!

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 2:24pm

Ok darlin, have you sat yourself down and made "THE LIST" yet?

Write the positives and negatives of this job? More money, more benefits...

The positives and negative of the move: Will I have family around? How do the kids feel? Can I offer them more with moving and taking this job?

Things like that. Make the list. It will help you decide and look on it from a paper side. THEN: REALIZE that some things may be more positive BUT one or two negative things may be major, so analyze it carefully.

This has helped me in 15 moves of mine (I moved 23 times but 15 on my own).

Big hugs,
Catherine

Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 2:28pm

Hi Jennifer! Glad your going after him in childsupport. I know it's another stress on you, but I know it will be worthwhile. I can feel it!

Try to go back on your diet. I know you feel better when you do. Re-evaluate what you eat. You said it's nerves and of course that won't help your stomach. So try some lighter meals that might even be a bit on the bland side. I always thought chicken was a great light meal and tasted wonderful. I am sure Judy has some awesome recipes.

So sorry your in so much pain! Back and hip can be sooo painful! That and toothaches! Let us know what they say.

I am also out of school right now, but not by choice. Can't wait to get money back in order and back into it!

Hugs,
Catherine

iVillage Member
Registered: 09-01-2006
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 3:00pm
Hey Cat - speaking of some good recipes - maybe we should have a thread before the end of August where we can each post one of our favourites kid-friendly recipes/meals....I am always looking for new easy ideas..... what do you think?
Rosecolouredspecs
Avatar for myprecioustwo
iVillage Member
Registered: 04-08-2003
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 3:20pm
I was thinking the same thing! How funny! Now that school is starting for some of our children, we should start a thread once the month on different quick recipes to share. We all have time constraints with coming home and cooking something nutritious. I know it's sometimes really hard for me and it makes me feel guilty that I"m sitting them in front of the TV sometimes with a meal that isn't up to par. I know my girls are always excited when I cook. So maybe tips on quick dishes or the prepared ones that you can dethaw quickly and put on the table.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 4:24pm
GREAT idea - thanks for that - I will start one!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-23-2007
Wed, 08-01-2007 - 7:54pm

Catherine,

I've made 2 lists:
The Pros and Cons list - obvious content there
The facts and fears list - where I write down the things that I know are true and the things that aren't facts just stuff I'm afraid of disguising themselves as facts. Such as Fact: I can't depend on him for money
Fear: I'll always be broke.

Fact: This job will require me to work a more traditional schedule.
Fear: I'll never get to see my kids and they will never be the same.

Fact: I will have to build a new support system of friends for myself and the kids.
Fear: We'll never have the kinds of close friends we have here.

Ironically, my cons list and my fears list were almost identical. My main reasons for not doing this are because I am afraid - afraid it will be too much for the kids to move again (3 schools and 3 houses in 2 years - of course one of the moves was a move back to our hometown), afraid it will be too much for me (do I have the emotional strength to get us all through this one last change), fear that a big job like this will take too much time away from my kids (but as a one parent/one income family now - I need more money and long term it will be better for all of us). I was just feeling settled where we are, I'm afraid of starting all over again.

While fear is a good instinct (swim away from that shark and all it's teeth), I've never in my life backed down from an opportunity due to fear. I shouldn't start now.

The more I write, the more I think I've already made this decision.

thanks for the idea for the list making. I was knee deep in water and dying of thirst!

M

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