ty and a follow up
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| Fri, 03-04-2005 - 9:34pm |
First of all I want to thank everyone for your warm responses to my post. You are a very empathic group and I'm glad I found you. It is sometimes nice to get someone else's view of your life. I'm often wondering how I'm doing on the divorce scale, if I'm coping as well as I should, making enough progress, etc. And your replies made me see the many good things that I've done- through it all.
One of you asked how my children are doing now. I'm happy to say that Rosalie, my dd who was having all the stomachaches and depression, is her old self again. She no longer spends her days lying on the couch saying she's sick and telling me how sad she is. Within about 6 months of X leaving, she was pretty much back to normal. Thank God. She is only 4. I hate how hard the divoce has been on the kids but the marriage was clearly worse on them. Annmarie, the other twin, is alright too. My son- also ok. In the beginning he would get angry and upset whenever X would come to get him and again when X would leave. He seems adjusted now. We have a very regular routine with the kids. I'm proud of the fact that I have let go of X so that we can have an amicable relationship. It's so much better for the kids. It isn't always possible, unfortunately, but it's definitely better.
I have a few lbs to lose and have been on the south beach diet for a week. I'm getting in some walking, which helps. I feel much better already. Last week I bought myself a pair of pink shoes. They were not very expensive but they make me feel great- a little feminine again. That's where I'm at now. I'm trying to take better care of me and doing the things that help me feel happy and relaxed as much as possible. It seems a good road. I'll keep you posted.
Amy

Amy,
I didn't get a chance to post to your other thread, but welcome.
I'm glad that you are moving forward and trying to work things through. It will take a lot of work, and time, to get "over" the disappointment and the anger. You're lucky that your ex is being such a great dad to the kids and not causing you further grief. I'm sure there's a few stories the ladies here can share of the not-so-good-ex's, myself included.
I found that really focusing on the positive things in my life and being busy really helped. I moved back to my hometown and went back to school after we split, and that was the best thing I could have done, I now have an EXCELLENT job and can more than provide a financially stable home on my own.
Also, don't worry too much about dating right now, you need to focus more on building some new friendships and interests. I'm sure that being home with three babies has left you feeling a little out of the loop, so get out there and get to know yourself in the adult world again. Take the time to think about who you are, where you're going and what your new role in life is. You're not just a mother, you're a strong and healthy independant woman taking charge of her life.
The time will come that you can begin to piece together what you really need/want/won't accept in a mate.
Alison