Update
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| Tue, 11-27-2007 - 1:36pm |
UPDATE
Ok so I posted on here a few days ago about my boyfriend "avoiding me" and not returning any of my phone calls. The incident started on Thanksgiving when he phoned me telling me had to get his daughter and would be up to see me. I didn't here from him until sunday night. When he called me he explained that he was super busy wih his cop job. He is a part time cop. He was working the murder that happened in Wadesville, IN. I told him that he at least could have called me and told me he was ok and just busy. He apologized and things seemed like they were fine. He went on to tell me all the great things he always says about me and my children. Before we hung up he said he loved me and he would call me the next day. (Monday). He said he promised he would.
Well guess what....he never called. So I got a little frustrated, but never called him. Then today I hadn't heard from him and he usually calls me on his breaks at work. I decided to call and I left a message.

Yikes.....If I recall correctly this is a fairly new relationship - just a couple of months now right?
Aerdna--You may not want to hear this but I really think this is a case of too much too soon!!
April
Some things that stand out in your posting: "So why is he doing this to me?" and "if he really loves me he would..."
This sounds victim-y.
"Expectations are premeditated resentments."
That is a great statement, Mark!!! So very true, and although I have never heard it phrased that way, I have very much LIVED it. With my failed marriage, there was ALOT of that going on. Expectations that were not met, expectations that were not even discussed (and not met)... and then of course... the resentment showed up. All over the place. From both parties.
I've definitely learned my lesson the hard way about expectations. Having expectations and expecting the other to "just know"... they can't. No one can read minds, although some people might be better guessers than others. You have expectations? You better lay them out and discuss them! You better make your needs known! And then you better be ready to "cut bait" if the other person refuses to meet your needs, because it won't be a match. But if the other person hears your needs/expectations, and works toward them... then it's good to go, and something worth building. (and of course- we all have to
~shrimpy
"A man who wants something will find a way; a man who doesn't will find an excuse." ~Stephen Dolley Jr.
~<