Update

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-10-2008
Update
4
Fri, 07-25-2008 - 2:02pm

I have been working a lot lately and trying to slip in some time with big guy. Well we had what I think is going to be our final date last night. I really like this guy and he would make any girl a great boyfriend but I just can not get past the weight. He came in for the goodnight kiss last night and a hug...and I was just like..UGH. No sparks. And this is not funny...in fact it is slightly tragic. I am so short (4ft 11 and 3/4) My arms could not really even get around him to hug him so...I just was like...ugh.


iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
In reply to: cutefont
Fri, 07-25-2008 - 2:18pm

I would tell him point blank - I really like you as a person and I appreciate the time we had. I was really hoping sparks would come about for me - but there is just something missing on my end and I am sorry about that because you are so nice. But I wish you well in your search.

You did your very best. I wish there would be sparks. But I also understand that when there are no sparks you cannot manufacture them. I wish I knew of a way? Or that someone else here had the magic answer.

That is a shame because he was such a nice guy. <:-(

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-24-2006
In reply to: cutefont
Fri, 07-25-2008 - 2:24pm
I agree. Being direct is the best way I think. I would word it somewhere along the lines of "I enjoyed my time spent with you and think you're a wonderful person. I just don't feel that the chemistry is there for me. I think you did give this a fair shot. Its not like you called it quits after 1 date because of his weight. You spent more time with him and found you really do like him as a person. But lets be honest, attractiong IS a factor. It's not everything, of course not. But we do like things for a reason. They attract us. (((HUGS))) its not an easy thing to do.

 

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-13-2008
In reply to: cutefont
Fri, 07-25-2008 - 3:07pm

YES - be direct and be honest.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
In reply to: cutefont
Fri, 07-25-2008 - 8:54pm

I am sorry its ending for you. I had hopes you would get past the weight thing. My husband got overweight and I was turned off. But then I have this wonderful friend who is overweight and I am still attracted to him. His personality makes up for it.


There are ways to break it off without hurting his feelings about the weight. You could say you just didnt feel the same attraction.


Laurie

anonymous