Venting..... trying not to be resentful

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Venting..... trying not to be resentful
11
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 11:27am

Sometimes I get irritated with EG and feel like he's taking me for granted.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 09-11-2007
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 11:48am

Oh, Isys.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 11:54am

Its entirely up to him.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-20-2007
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 12:29pm

I'm having the same kind of issues although he never expects me to change my plans once they have been made for him. Unfortunately he may change plans he has with me with will makes me mad!!!! That has happened any number of times and he doesn't understand how angry it makes me. It happens much more now that we live together and he is taking me for granted. I'm hoping to have a long discussion with him before we head out tonight and try to start the new year with a clean slate.

Sorry this is weighing you down. I personally would have to say something and would not be able to hold it in.

Good luck.
Priscilla

Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 2:42pm

I am with you on that.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 4:11pm

He called again and left me VM that he's still most likely going, but there's drama on the dd15 front. She doesn't want to go. WHATEVER!!!! I really don't want to talk to him and hear about all the teen drama. Right now I don't have any drama here and am happy with a peaceful evening with my kids. We're going to see Marley and Me and are heading downtown to watch the "ball drop" here. There's tons of free activities and music shows.

I'm being sweet as pie and try to be understanding. He really wants to be with his kids and I think that's a huge reason why he doesn't plan ahead with me. At least that's what I'm trying to make myself believe. I can't control what's happening and I'm not letting it get me down.

Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 4:49pm

I believe one can plan ahead (is there any other planning?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 5:52pm
So you expect your kids to keep their commitments to you. Do you expect your girlfriend to pick up and be with you if the kids cancel? That's kind of where I'm at. I can totally understand that he wants kid time, but I'm really irked that he expects I'll be home waiting like old faithful for him to see me if the kid thing doesn't work out.
Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 6:05pm

No, I don't expect anyone to be waiting for me. I am usually pleasantly surprised if anyone did. In fact, I would rather not have anyone wait for me. I grew up with parents that did not want anyone to do anything for them because they did not want to be obligated so I still have that in me. I don't want anyone to wait for me for that has me feel obligated.

Mark





We're fools whether we dance or not, so we might as well dance. ~Japanese Proverb







iVillage Member
Registered: 10-30-2004
Wed, 12-31-2008 - 6:11pm

I'm just trying not to let this resentment destroy our relationship. My ex-H never wanted to do anything and I would go off and do stuff, but feel resentful. It's what killed our relationship. I am having a hard time with acceptance. But then I think about him trying to spend time with his kids and how it never works out the way he wants it because his ex-W takes over the situation.

What are CW's plans for this evening? I know you guys had a disagreement about holidays, how did you handle it?

Avatar for mhash
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-27-2003
Fri, 01-02-2009 - 2:00pm

Cute Widow and I worked it out.

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