Waiting impatiently......

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
Waiting impatiently......
10
Thu, 05-12-2005 - 12:24pm
Ok, so in our last email (Monday) he said he would let me know what Friday will be go for us to go out again. Of course this has been a boring, slow, week and I am trying to keep busy (isn't that always the way) instead of sitting around staring at the phone and checking email. LOL! I have to admit though, I think about him a lot, and I have been blushing a lot! Co-workers have noticed! LOL! To think we haven't even kissed yet! Anyway, just wanted to share (and kill time)!
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Thu, 05-12-2005 - 12:39pm
Being patient and letting the relationship take it's natural course is hard. Maybe it's time for a new hobby? Keep sitting on those hands. It's ten times better to get that call and know he was thinking of you, than to leave a message fishing for some kind of attention.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-11-2005
Thu, 05-12-2005 - 1:11pm
I know exactly where you are coming from. My ex and I are trying to "startover" he's getting freaked, and left until Sunday to visit friends...not calling to see whats up is driving me crazy, but I vowed I would let him call first...lol so you have my sympathy!! Waiting until Sunday ahhhh! how will I ever make it....lol ;) Good luck with the wait :)
Stef
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
Thu, 05-12-2005 - 1:57pm

The hardest lesson learned for us girls with dating is that unless you have a call from him and effort from him you have nothing. Calling him does not make him like you or want to pursue you more.

It might make you feel good but it is not a good thing. If you don't believe me, take a look at the Dating Doyenne board here on ivillage - it is filled with stories of frustrated women who just love a guy and go crazy because he doesn't call. They get even worse when they have slept with the guy on the first date.

You have to chill and not think about him that way - no blushing and no fantasies/wishes in your head - don't build up expectations too soon. Keep busy with your life and let this one go its own course and see if it is meant to be.

If you are bored that is a bad sign. Do whatever you can to get too busy to breathe!! It will do you wonders.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
Thu, 05-12-2005 - 2:38pm
I agree with all of you guys! Thanks for sharing! I am starting to "make myself busy" today, I hate slow days. Of course I will let you all know the moment he calls/emails me.
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
Thu, 05-12-2005 - 4:14pm

I was just reading a current article from whatittakes.com and found this letter and thought of you immediately - so I came back to post:

Anyway, here is what this lady is saying to her coach:

"I've been dating a man off and on since 1998, when I had been divorced about 9 years. We are both "gun shy". I was attracted to his sense of humor first and then began to notice a lot of other things I liked. I kept my distance and thought we'd be just friends and dinner date partners -- nothing more. I began to have other feelings for him which I didn't understand... but I didn't reveal all my feelings and scare him away. I simply let him know how much I enjoyed spending time with him and that I look forward to our dates and that he's good company. He started kissing me goodnight without provocation by me. I let him be first to say "I love you". I am 59 and he is 69. We're both divorced and have been single for several years.

I have NEVER experienced anything like this…this time I did not get the cart before the horse because you were guiding me with all the good insight and information to do it right this time. I don't know where this is going but we are both enjoying the journey."

http://www.whatittakes.com/Archive/RCN170plus/41405RCN184.html

(That is a relationship coaching type site - I have spent a lot of time there reading her articles - otherwise I would be in the "watching the phone and always trying to push everything along boat" - hence my advice to you).

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 8:49am

Hey! That is a great website! And the advice is priceless! I still haven't heard from him, but I recently decided to try dating online, so I am keeping myself busy checking profiles of other guys - LOL - so I don't put all my eggs in one basket!

In my heart though, I feel that this man is the one who got away, and I am hoping he is thinking that to. I like him a lot, which is why I am NOT going to call him or email him. I want him to chase me at least a little :)

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-25-2004
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 12:45pm

PERFECT - online dating is the best thing to do when you get ancy!!

And the stories you will have will be fun. Share with us what you find!!

The perfect one will think you are perfect - that is what you want - and of course you have to like him, too.

The challenge of love is to find Mr. Right, not Mr. Right Now. :-)

What do you have planned for your weekend?

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-14-2003
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 2:06pm

I planned a lot this weekend, so that I wouldn't wait by the phone (LOL) DD and I have swim class, then I have to unpack a lot of boxes that have been in storage and organize my house. I have to go out and buy a gift for my cousin's graduation and I have a communion to go to on Sunday. Keeping myself busy as a bee.

Spoke to my brother this morning. He thinks I should send a short email to the guy. Just to keep the communication going. What do you think?

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-19-2004
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 2:38pm
I wouldn't do it. He shouldn't need prompting from you to be in touch.

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iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Fri, 05-13-2005 - 2:46pm
Spoke to my brother this morning. He thinks I should send a short email to the guy. Just to keep the communication going. What do you think?



My opinion is to do NOTHING - don't call or email - wait for him.