Want more time with him

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
Want more time with him
10
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 4:45pm

I am trying to be patient with his car and home improvements. But I just want to spend more time with RG. I know if I lived closer I could stop by his place for evenings here and there. But I only get one day a week with him since his days off are spent sanding the car and getting it ready for paint. I cant wait for it to be done. So I will offer to help with the home improvements. I have done many of those on my house. And try to be patient. Its just difficult because we always enjoy each others company.


Frustrated.


Laurie

anonymous
iVillage Member
Registered: 02-15-2008
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 5:05pm

OOOOOOHHHHH Laurie, can I relate to what you are going through!!!

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2003
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 7:52pm

his days off are spent sanding the car and getting it ready for paint.


Sanding his car?

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 8:11pm

"the way to make a man become more interested in spending time with you, is to have such a full life that you're not constantly available."


Totally agree!


If you're constantly available when HE has free time, then he's going to rely on that for every time... and you don't need that.


Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 8:13pm

Sorry to hear youre in the same boat. His situation is temporary too. The car is in the final stages and he has to be there when the shop has openings. Its been a 10 year long ongoing project and its all worked around the availability of the shop. All I can say is I better get first rides in the thing when its done.


I hope you get some time with him soon. I have a feeling they know that we are being patient and waiting. Hopefully they appreciate it too.


Laurie

anonymous
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 9:24pm
I understand this sounds like a long term project, but someone in a RELATIONSHIP, needs to prioritize. I'd not stand for that for too very long.

Photobucket

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 9:48pm

"Sanding his car? He would rather sand his car than spend time with you? Is that the 1960's equivalent of telling a guy you can't see him because you need to wash your hair? Huhnee, that sounds a little weak to me."

SPEW alert- how in the world do you think of these things - that is funny. But very true I think.

When a guy doesn't want to spend time with you - that is that - you do not have to be in pain wanting more time and hoping someone will like you as much as you do them when they do not and do not want the time. You only have to realize that you need the right person and not to wish for more with the wrong person.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-19-2008
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 10:39pm

I need to explain things better. He does make time for me. He put aside his home improvements to see me several weeks in a row. The car sanding project is high priority since it is in a shop that charges $500 a day (no lie I have seen the receipt) for each day they work on it. Its been a long on going project that is nearing the end. He works on it every day he can while its down there to save costs. By the time this thing is done he will have put over $100,000 into it. So it is a big deal.

I do plan on helping with the home improvements when he gets back into it. We were supposed to install carpet today but he was exhausted from working 12 hour days over the weekend.

Plus I have my priorities too which are kids and running. Its just frustrating right now since he is in deep with the car.

I have no intentions of breaking it off with him over this whatsoever. Just frustrating that I want more time with him and have to wait it out.

Laurie

anonymous
iVillage Member
Registered: 05-13-2005
Mon, 06-16-2008 - 11:32pm

The only thing is that you are frustrated - I just realized from this post:
http://messageboards.ivillage.com/n/mb/message.asp?webtag=iv-rlsolomother&msg=12361.1&ctx=128

that he is 47 and NBM.

It is up to you how much time you wait - but don't wait too long if he is not giving you what you want.

I feel bad for you that you tried to date others and then they turned out to be such boofs - the airline pilot that is married, etc. It is hard out there. But please don't let that stress you - there is one who will adore you and whom you will adore just as much.

And I do know it stinks when you find one you really like and connect with and then they don't want as much as you. No matter how much time you wait, it won't make a difference for that matter.

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-07-2005
Tue, 06-17-2008 - 12:49am

Laurie,


How good has he been about contacting you in between seeing him?


Photobucket
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-03-2003
Tue, 06-17-2008 - 11:01am

shop that charges $500 a day


Do you consider this good money management?