Weekend update
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Weekend update
| Mon, 02-11-2008 - 2:15pm |
Countryboy's work schedule changed at the last minute on Sat so we ended up doing dinner and a movie in the evening instead of early afternoon!

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It sounds like you had a great time!
Some comments from my own experiences and perspective:
The underlying reason for not introducing strange wo/men to our children is mainly having attachments made to a parent substitute too early for if the relationship does not work out then the kids have yet another broken relationship to deal with.
I know that the reason for waiting is to see if things work out with "us" before adding the kids into the picture--I do understand that and maybe it's just because I was so burned last time with a guy he dumped me because of the kids but I feel okay about him coming over--I am not making a big deal out of it--he's coming over with pizza and we're going to play board games, just really light.
April
Oh yes I agree, if it feels right then go with it!
Sorry, I don't know your whole story, so I'm not sure how long you have been together...doesn't sound long.
I met a wonderful man two years ago who said all of those things to me. I slowly introduced my kids to him. Doing it in the best way I knew how...first he was mommy's friend...then after a while, my 11 yr old asked me if we were together and i said yes.
Two years later, we are no closer to a futher committment--I am still
I agree with Mark when he said if it feels right do it. But I also wanted to chime in with the "be careful" warning as I think it can be hard to not want to rush some things when we're in a new relationship, and things are feeling so wonderful and amazing and we just want to go another step, take it to another level and even when we're feeling very level headed and in control, its hard to not go with all these wonferful new feelings! It's exciting!! A new love and relationship and all those wonderful feelings to go along. With that said, I feel its so important that kids not become involved unless a situation is going to move ahead. Kids attach on so easily even if the person is introduced as "Mommy's friend". That doesn't really mean anything, if they like the person, they're going to get attached regardless if this person is over for "hanging out with pizza and a movie" or "cuddling up to mommy on the couch for everyone to see"
QUOTE: "I do not plan on rushing into anything crazy but I don't dismiss people that do--my grandparents were married within 3 months of meeting and they had 0ver 60 years together before my Grandma died--my parents were married within 11 months of meeting and they have not regretted it a day--I know those things happen so I do not tend to dismiss them...please don't get me wrong--I am not saying I plan to rush into anything, just that sometimes it's okay to just know something feels right and to go with it! JMHO!"
Just another side note, I have a story similar, but wanted to disclaim, again, the difference between your situation and these, are that kids weren't involved. Your grandparents met and got married quickly, but they didn't have young children at the time did they? Did your parents when they met? Again, not saying it doesn't happen, just saying what's the harm in leaving the kids out of things for a lil bit longer? The don't process things the way an adult can.
OK my story. Met my husband when I was 22, he moved in with me 2 months after laying eyes on eachother for the first time. A year later we were pregnant, had bought a car & house together. When DS was 11 mths old we got married. A year later we had another baby. 19 mths later our third baby. We were extremely happy together, unfortunately it was cut short as he passed away 18 mths ago, when our youngest was less than 2 mths. So I too believe in things feeling right and going for it and it working out. That's awesome about your grandparents and parents :)
This is SUCH a really hard line. I've been going through this for 7 years. On one hand, I can waste MONTHS not showing a guy my kids, only to find out they don't like my kids. Then I spent all that time. I mean WASTED all that time on someone that couldn't, wouldn't or didn't deal well with children.
On the other hand, you don't want to introduce yourself for reasons we all know well and those that Mark mentioned.
Soooooo it's a fine line.
Although I would be VERY careful with the goo goo moment, I say be very careful. I have been given the moon and the stars and ALOT of proposals within the first month of dating someone. I mean A LOT of proposals.
Just a side note--my Grandma suprisingly had a 2 year old when she met my grandfather--I know, not typical for the 40's but true--my mom had had a child but as you may remember from previous posts
April
Ah, Jeeze - the whole 'when to introduce him to the kids debate" LOL!
I talked to my kids last night about meeting him and they said they would love to.
April
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